Keyword Kraziness: Boxing Day Edition

It’s time once again to review some of the search strings that have brought people here only to discover that it’s not the place to find what they’re looking for.

my apartment complex let me renew my lease even though i did not qualify
Is that a question?

jessica alba’s ass is distracting
We’ll see just how true that remains as her pregnancy progresses (or if it remains distracting in a good way).

brandie malay pics
brandie malay breasts
brandie malay bra
Here are all of the pictures of her that I was able to find via Google and Ask.com image searches and on the HGTV Web site:







There were no pictures (not even fake nudes) of her anywhere on Usenet. I didn’t try any of the torrent searches, but I would bet that you wouldn’t find anything if you were to try that yourself (try searching here if you don’t believe me)
I don’t suspect that there will ever be many more of them, and, as she is the host of a relatively obscure TV show on HGTV of all places and not a young pop star/spoiled heiress/coked-up actress, it seems unlikely that there are any photos of her standing around in her underwear (or less) available for public consumption. After all, when you consider how obsessively the paparazzi stalk people like Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton, it’s frankly amazing that we don’t see even more shots of their genitals and naked breasts than we already do. Given that someone like Brandie Malay is never going to get that level of stalkery attention, I doubt that anyone apart from her husband will get to see her wearing anything less than she wears on her show. To put it another way, I don’t think we’ll ever see the “ hidden potential” of her breasts. I will say that I agree that this is a damn shame.

my little pony jerk
What?

i have conversations with the tv
Are they with my TV? Because if they are, that two-timing bitch is going to get a serious talking to.

maddox crappy pictures
I assume you’re talking about these.

And that’s all for this edition, there were also, of course, the usual suspects, but there’s not point in including those.
In terms of your regularly scheduled Threshold entry, today was pretty low-key.
I got up when some old lady dialed a wrong number. My number is very close to the number of a local pharmacy, so I occasionally find myself answering the phone and letting people know that, no, in fact, I can’t fill their prescriptions for Viagra or Valtrex.
After that I did the usual sitting around doing nothing before taking a shower and heading out to pick up some groceries, at which time I was thrilled to discover that the grocery store was a virtual ghost town. It was such a rare treat to be able to move about so freely.
The drawback, of course, was that only one actual register was open and was jam-packed with the handful of competing shoppers, so I had to go through the self-checkout. This is what I would normally do, but I had a fair amount of stuff, and I usually prefer a real live cashier when I’m buying more than a few things.
Why? Well, on the self-checkout the bagging area only has room for about three full bags, and it’s sort of hit-or-miss as to whether or not the register will freak out when you put one bag in your cart to make room for another. Sometimes it will only freak out and demand that you return the bag for a few seconds before giving you the option of telling it that you have, in fact, removed the bag. Other times it will just stay freaked out until an employee comes along and tells it that it’s okay and that you aren’t trying to abscond with the items you’ve already scanned and will be paying for shortly, and that you’ve moved them out of the way.
It did a lot of the latter today.
When I got home I sat on the couch to take my shoes off and then struggled to come up with a reason to not go to bed. I couldn’t come up with one, but decided to defer making a decision about that until after I’d had lunch. By the time I’d finished lunch I’d gotten caught up in some show on National Geographic Channel HD, so I watched that, and then another show, but then, at around 2, decided that being awake just wasn’t for me, so I ended up taking a nap until a bit after 4.
Oh, and sometime before 2 I hung the framed Marvel super heroes stamps that Kathleen gave me in my office. See?





And that’s pretty much all there was to my day.