When Dan and I went to lunch yesterday he had gotten his food and went to find us a table while I waited for my food to be ready (he gets what I call preferential Asian treatment from the mostly-Asian staff; no matter what he orders or when, he always gets his food before I get mine).
Once I got to the table I noticed a woman at a nearby table looking rather distressed, while several men were hovering around her solicitously. Eventually the men put a bunch of chairs together and laid her out across them.
I looked over, then looked back, and Dan said, "She's having chest pains."
Eventually the paramedics arrived - it can't be good for business to have paramedics at your cafe at lunchtime - and began tending to her.
As we were walking back, Dan said that when she had just been sitting there looking miserable some guy came up to her and yelled "WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!"
Apparently he was actually trying to be sympathetic but just panicked, but Dan said it initially came off like he was saying, "You do this everywhere we go! Fuckin' drama queen!"
This made me LOL.
*****
Lately, for the hell of it more than anything else, I've been spiking my hair with gel in the morning.
On Wednesday when I stopped by my boss' office to say welcome back, she commented on my hair, and then said to her boss, who was checking in with her, "I leave the office for a while and Jon's hair stands on end!"
*****
One problem with spiking my hair is that it limits my hair's ability to serve as an impromptu towel if I spill something on my hands.
*****
(During our little get-together to have cake and welcome back the boss)
Co-Worker 1: When she gets here, should we sing something? Like "For she's a jolly good fellow," maybe?
Co-Worker 2: I don't know the words to that.
Co-Worker 1: What? It's just, you know, "for she's a jolly good fellow, for she's..."
Co-Worker 2: (Shaking her head and looking hopelessly confused) No...I don't...I've never...
Co-Worker 1: But..I...everyone knows...it's just, "For she's a -"
Co-Worker 2: (Realizing that sarcastically playing dumb isn't getting the point across) No singing!
(For the record, I'm increasingly coming to think that Co-Worker 2 is awesome.)
Showing posts with label quick shots. Show all posts
Showing posts with label quick shots. Show all posts
Friday, October 09, 2009
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Quick Shots
A Conversation At Work:
C0-Worker: You should have been a comedian. You missed your calling.
Me: Mm. I definitely missed something.
*********
This is what my day was like on Thursday:
10-11: Meeting
11-12: Meeting
1-2: Meeting
2-3: Meeting (Actually, I was triple-booked)
3-5: Meeting
5-5:30: Meeting
With all of these meetings, how am I supposed to get anything done? And how am I going to juggle the demands of my career when I'm a recent widower trying to raise my three daughters, with the help of my brother-in-law, the bad boy rocker, and my best friend, the zany stand-up comic?
Oh, wait. That last bit was the premise of Full House, and bears no relation to my life.
Still, the point about too many meetings remains valid.
*********
It only took two and a half years or so, but I've finally finished bagging and boarding all of my comics. The next step is getting them all in order and entering them into my database, but when it's all over, if someone asks me, "What have you accomplished in life?" I'll have somethig I can point to and say "This."
And yes, that really is as sad as it sounds.
*********
Now It Can (Probably) Be Told Department:
When I bought my condo back in early 2006 there was a knock on my door sometime within the first day or two of my moving in.
It was a representative from Nielsen Media (the people who, among other things, do TV ratings) who informed me that for the last few months or so he'd been driving by my place waiting to see if anyone had moved in yet.
Turns out that the previous tenants had been a Nielsen Household, and he explained that Nielsen Households are selected by address and are typically selected for a period of about two years. The previous tenants had been a Nielsen Household for about six months, which meant that, now that I had moved in, it was my turn to be a Nielsen Household for the balance of the two years.
So from that point until I moved, I had a hand in determining what people watch.
I'll probably write more about my experience as a Nielsen Household some other time, but it just occurred to me that it's been about two years since I moved, and "up to two years" was the period during which I was not legally permitted to reveal to strangers that I had been a Nielsen Household. So now that I can, I'm spilling the beans.
*********
On my way in to work this morning (I had meetings from 9-10, 10-11, 12-1, and 1-2) I was listening to the Suicidal Tendencies album Lights...Camera...Revolution, and got several lines from some of the songs stuck in my head. It had been my intention to greet Scott, via IM, with the line "Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, fuck you Jack I be a lunatic," but circumstances (and a faulty memory) prevented that. However, when I had a spare moment and visited Comics Should Be Good! I read an article that started off with another line from a song on that album (albeit with the very last part omitted): "And if I offended you, oh I'm sorry but maybe you need to be offended, but here's my apology and one more thing: fuck you." There was a footnote attached to that quote, which was actually another line from the song I was going to quote at Scott: "I don't need no PhD to be a doctor of fuckin' misery."
There's no point to that anecdote, of course, other than to draw attention to a weird - and profanity-laden - coincidence.
*********
This Is Why You're Fat.
C0-Worker: You should have been a comedian. You missed your calling.
Me: Mm. I definitely missed something.
*********
This is what my day was like on Thursday:
10-11: Meeting
11-12: Meeting
1-2: Meeting
2-3: Meeting (Actually, I was triple-booked)
3-5: Meeting
5-5:30: Meeting
With all of these meetings, how am I supposed to get anything done? And how am I going to juggle the demands of my career when I'm a recent widower trying to raise my three daughters, with the help of my brother-in-law, the bad boy rocker, and my best friend, the zany stand-up comic?
Oh, wait. That last bit was the premise of Full House, and bears no relation to my life.
Still, the point about too many meetings remains valid.
*********
It only took two and a half years or so, but I've finally finished bagging and boarding all of my comics. The next step is getting them all in order and entering them into my database, but when it's all over, if someone asks me, "What have you accomplished in life?" I'll have somethig I can point to and say "This."
And yes, that really is as sad as it sounds.
*********
Now It Can (Probably) Be Told Department:
When I bought my condo back in early 2006 there was a knock on my door sometime within the first day or two of my moving in.
It was a representative from Nielsen Media (the people who, among other things, do TV ratings) who informed me that for the last few months or so he'd been driving by my place waiting to see if anyone had moved in yet.
Turns out that the previous tenants had been a Nielsen Household, and he explained that Nielsen Households are selected by address and are typically selected for a period of about two years. The previous tenants had been a Nielsen Household for about six months, which meant that, now that I had moved in, it was my turn to be a Nielsen Household for the balance of the two years.
So from that point until I moved, I had a hand in determining what people watch.
I'll probably write more about my experience as a Nielsen Household some other time, but it just occurred to me that it's been about two years since I moved, and "up to two years" was the period during which I was not legally permitted to reveal to strangers that I had been a Nielsen Household. So now that I can, I'm spilling the beans.
*********
On my way in to work this morning (I had meetings from 9-10, 10-11, 12-1, and 1-2) I was listening to the Suicidal Tendencies album Lights...Camera...Revolution, and got several lines from some of the songs stuck in my head. It had been my intention to greet Scott, via IM, with the line "Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, fuck you Jack I be a lunatic," but circumstances (and a faulty memory) prevented that. However, when I had a spare moment and visited Comics Should Be Good! I read an article that started off with another line from a song on that album (albeit with the very last part omitted): "And if I offended you, oh I'm sorry but maybe you need to be offended, but here's my apology and one more thing: fuck you." There was a footnote attached to that quote, which was actually another line from the song I was going to quote at Scott: "I don't need no PhD to be a doctor of fuckin' misery."
There's no point to that anecdote, of course, other than to draw attention to a weird - and profanity-laden - coincidence.
*********
This Is Why You're Fat.
Saturday, March 07, 2009
Some Quick Shots
Watchmen author Alan Moore has no involvement with movies based on his stories, takes no money (he stipulates that his share should go to the artists) from them, and requests that his name not appear anywhere in the film. This article, which also does a decent job of explaining what really makes Watchmen unfilmable with more brevity and coherence than I could, provides some more information on this, as well as an essential Moore reading list.
Given that Moore's name isn't listed in the credits, the movie version of V for Vendetta stated "Based on the graphic novel by David Lloyd." David Lloyd was the artist on V.
Watchmen, however, went a slightly different route, stating that it was "Based on the graphic novel co-created and illustrated by Dave Gibbons."
***
On the ride back from the theater to Scott's house, I was the odd man out in that I was the only person of the four of us in the van who isn't a father. There was a discussion about their relative strictness as parents. I said, "I'm so strict that I won't even let my children exist."
***
Seriously, Carla Gugino would be the best birthday present ever.
***
Some lady brought her baby to the movie last night. To a movie that featued people exploding and having their bloody remains drip down on people from the ceiling, a pregnant woman getting shot in cold blood, and a giant blue wang, among many other disturbing images.
Also, there was some douchebag sitting in front of us who kept shouting out "Marco" to some friend of his somewhere else in the theater, who would respond with "Polo." He also angrily told a woman - I'm assuming he knew her - "SHUT UP!" when she got excited about the preview for the next Harry Potter movie. Fortunately he mostly shut the hell up during the actual movie.
***
Being out last night meant that four and half hours' worth of recorded shows piled up on my DVR while I was away. One of those shows was supposed to be the latest episode of Batman: The Brave and The Bold, but turned out to actually be some other random Cartoon Network show I've never heard of. WTF, Cartoon Network?
***
I'll probably write up a proper post tomorrow, including some of this week's various rants. So there's that to look forward to, or dread, as the case may be.
Given that Moore's name isn't listed in the credits, the movie version of V for Vendetta stated "Based on the graphic novel by David Lloyd." David Lloyd was the artist on V.
Watchmen, however, went a slightly different route, stating that it was "Based on the graphic novel co-created and illustrated by Dave Gibbons."
***
On the ride back from the theater to Scott's house, I was the odd man out in that I was the only person of the four of us in the van who isn't a father. There was a discussion about their relative strictness as parents. I said, "I'm so strict that I won't even let my children exist."
***
Seriously, Carla Gugino would be the best birthday present ever.
***
Some lady brought her baby to the movie last night. To a movie that featued people exploding and having their bloody remains drip down on people from the ceiling, a pregnant woman getting shot in cold blood, and a giant blue wang, among many other disturbing images.
Also, there was some douchebag sitting in front of us who kept shouting out "Marco" to some friend of his somewhere else in the theater, who would respond with "Polo." He also angrily told a woman - I'm assuming he knew her - "SHUT UP!" when she got excited about the preview for the next Harry Potter movie. Fortunately he mostly shut the hell up during the actual movie.
***
Being out last night meant that four and half hours' worth of recorded shows piled up on my DVR while I was away. One of those shows was supposed to be the latest episode of Batman: The Brave and The Bold, but turned out to actually be some other random Cartoon Network show I've never heard of. WTF, Cartoon Network?
***
I'll probably write up a proper post tomorrow, including some of this week's various rants. So there's that to look forward to, or dread, as the case may be.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Quick Shots
Too lazy for a regular post, so please accept these assorted links.
"K" is for "Kirby"
The Jack Kirby Alphabet
(Found via Mark Evanier's blog)
Everyone knows that girls can't animate, especially Uncle Walt
or
More like Walt Dickney
Walt Disney rejection letter to an aspiring female animaor from 1938
(Another one from Mark Evanier)
Not for the faint of heart, but often funny
The 50 Most Loathsome People of 2008
(Currently throwing a 503 error; found via Pharyngula)
It's not the Longbox, but it'll do
Welcome back, Dave Campbell!
(Found via The Invincible Super Blog)
...and other elements that are not suitable for children under 16 years of age
Robot Chicken Humping Robot!
(Found via Topless Robot...wow, that's a lot of use of the word "robot.")
"K" is for "Kirby"
The Jack Kirby Alphabet
(Found via Mark Evanier's blog)
Everyone knows that girls can't animate, especially Uncle Walt
or
More like Walt Dickney
Walt Disney rejection letter to an aspiring female animaor from 1938
(Another one from Mark Evanier)
Not for the faint of heart, but often funny
The 50 Most Loathsome People of 2008
(Currently throwing a 503 error; found via Pharyngula)
It's not the Longbox, but it'll do
Welcome back, Dave Campbell!
(Found via The Invincible Super Blog)
...and other elements that are not suitable for children under 16 years of age
Robot Chicken Humping Robot!
(Found via Topless Robot...wow, that's a lot of use of the word "robot.")
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