Long Day, With Stuff Afterwards

I hate having to do stuff after work. Unless I'm doing something fun, and how often does that happen?
I'm not discounting Riff Trax Night with Scott, which is fun, but that primarily involves just going home, which is all I generally want to do when I finish work.
Today I had to do two things after work. It might as well have been two thousand for as much of a drain on me as it was.
First I went to the Chiropractor. As mentioned, that involves going into "historic" Leesburg, which is to say the part of town where being a run-down hovel counts as having historic character, the streets were laid out for horse-drawn carriages, and most of the businesses fall into one of two categories: places that sell expensive crap to people who have more money than sense or old, just hanging on by their fingernails places that people go to as an absolute last resort.
Still, there's something to be said for historic districts.
And that something is, "Tear them down and pave over them."
Screw history.
(Okay, maybe I'm not exactly in a great mood.)
While I was being adjusted the doctor asked me about the Watchmen movie and what I thought of it. I said that I liked it, for what it was, but that my perspective on it was a bit different from most people's, given that the comic is my favorite book of all time. I added, "Actually, it might be my favorite anything of all time."
After that I had to go to the eye doctor.
That took way longer than it should have, and there were all these other tests and crap they wanted to do, and the whole time I'm thinking, "You're thieves. You're stealing my time. Worse, I'm paying you to steal my time."
Just because I waste a lot of time doesn't mean that my time has no value to me. After all, I'm the one wasting it. That's my decision. And quite frankly, I'd rather waste my time than give it to most people.
As I said to Scott earlier today while pre-complaining about the two things - yes, I do have perspective; I know it was only two things - I said that I can't even begin to understand the people who are constantly running around doing stuff.
This is among the many reasons I could never be a parent. My kids would never get to be involved in extracurricular activities.
"Dad, can I join the soccer team?"
"Will I have to do anything?"
"Well, yeah. You'd have to take me to practices, and come to my games, and-"
"No. Here, I'll order you a soccer video game from Amazon."
(This hypothetical exchange brings to mind one of my favorite scenes from The Simpsons:
Bart: Dad, can I have fifty bucks to buy a ticket to a rap concert?
Homer: Go to hell.
Bart: Well, if I pay for the ticket myself can I go?
Homer: Sure, knock yourself out.
Bart: I love you, dad.
Homer: I love you, too, Jerry.)
Anyway, as I was trying to get the hell out of there, I said, "You're all very nice and everything, but honestly, I'm tired and I just want to go home."
One of the girls made a mock offended sound and said, "But Jon, we like you."
I responded with, "Fine, then I'll just start randomly hanging out here all the time. See how much you like me then."
That got a couple of laughs, at least.
Finally, after over an hour there, I was free to come home and waste my time as I saw fit. That mostly involved watching last night's episodes of The Daily Show and The Colbert Report.
And, eventually, writing this.
Tomorrow should be a better day. After all, it'll be Riff Trax Night, and I should be receiving my new - ridiculously expensive - toy.
So maybe by Thursday you'll see a post from a much cheerier Jon than is posting today.
Remember, I said "maybe."

25% Ass

Today was one of those days that dragged.
Usually the morning goes by pretty fast – I get in, do some stuff, look up, and suddenly it’s 10:00 – and the afternoon drags, but at one point I was convinced that it must be at least 10:00, but I looked up and it was only 8:30.
Oddly enough, though, the afternoon went by a little faster than usual.
As things are back on their regular schedule, I stopped by the comic shop on my way home, then got a sub from the Subway next to it.
I’ll be honest with you; I really don’t feel like writing an entry.
However, I probably won’t be posting anything tomorrow, so I thought I should make at least a quarter-assed attempt tonight.
Maybe I’ll give you the remaining 75% of my ass on Friday.

The Adventures Of Jon And The Very Long Day

So I put in my one day of work today.
And what a day.
First off, Scott was out because he’s taking a Perl training class this week. He’d thought it was only Tuesday and Wednesday, so he was surprised on Tuesday when he found out that it was Tuesday-Friday.
(The Tuesday-Wednesday class is next week, and he and I are taking it together. It’s an intro to Flash.)
Simon showed up – and as close to on-time as seems to be possible for him – but he brought with him a case of Pink Eye, which, in an environment of shared resources (keyboards, phones, stripper poles, etc.) is not a welcome guest, so our boss sent him home.
That would have left just me to man every station, but fortunately we have a system that automatically e-mails people to let them know about OT slots when someone is going to be off (assuming the manager enters it into the calendar correctly, which our boss did), to which someone had responded, so I had some help.
He’ll also be in tomorrow, which is good, because if Simon is still out that means that no one from our shift will actually be there.
Of course, I’m letting the fact that this isn’t my problem be one of my birthday presents and am not worrying about it.
(As an aside, Brian called to ask if Scott is going to be in tomorrow. I said no, and as it dawned on him that he might very well be the one who has to help fill in for us, he said a lot of swear words that I won’t repeat, although I will say that one of them rhymed with gun of a witch and sounded exactly like son of a bitch.)
Even so, it proved to be an irritating day full of minor annoyances and various weird shit that made things even more annoying.
And it was long.
It didn’t help matters any that I didn’t get to eat lunch until almost 2.
Still, once it was over I drove out of there like a bat out of hell, and when I got to the last major intersection I got an early birthday present from the Universe in the form of actually hitting it when the arrow was green. In over a year of taking that route home that’s only happened one other time. Pretty much every other time I get there just after the arrow turned off and have to sit through a full cycle of those long-ass lights.
And then I was home where I eventually settled in to watch – and laugh at – new episodes of My Name is Earl and The Office.
Kathleen called (immediately after which Brian called to have the aforementioned conversation) to plan for a “birthday breakfast” tomorrow, as it would be too much of a hassle for her to go to work, come back to Leesburg for lunch, and then drive back to work.
So as a birthday present I get to wake up early on my day off! Hooray!
Honestly, though, it will be nice to see Kathleen, as I haven’t since back in December when she burst in to my place in a flurry of activity, leaving behind a living thing (the fish) in her wake.
On Saturday Scott and Stacy are taking me out for dinner because, as Stacy said, I’m a “good guy.” When I grunted, she said, “Well, we like you,” to which I responded, “Well, I suppose there’s no accounting for taste.”
Stacy had IMed me at work today to apologize for not de-hairing the couch on Sunday. I told her that it wasn’t a big deal, but she insisted it was, so I told her that I forgave her.
Joke’s on her; I didn’t forgive shit!
(Mostly because I didn’t feel there was anything to be forgiven, to paraphrase Andy – I mean Drew – from tonight’s Office.)
Anyway, now I’m here writing this.
And you’re there, reading it.