6:55 AM

The time: 6:55 AM
The place: My bedroom
The alarm clock activates my iPod, which begins playing the song “Elsewhere” by Sarah McLachlan.

Me (thinking): Hey, I love this song. That’s nice. I think I’ll just lie here for a while and listen to it and then drift slowly back to sleep.

The time: 6:56 AM
The setting: My bedroom
The song is still playing. I’m still in bed, but there’s a nagging suspicion in the back of my mind that the music isn’t just some random occurrence.

Me: Aw crap.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how I started my day.
I’d taken some Tylenol PM before going to bed because I wasn’t feeling terribly sleepy and I was suffering from the various aches and pains that have, in recent years, become an increasingly pervasive presence in my life.
Unfortunately, the sleepiness-inducing effects of the pills decided not to kick in until after I actually – finally – fell asleep, leading to a general grogginess that lasted for the better part of the morning.
On Sunday evening I was sitting at my computer doing whatever it is I do while spending the majority of my time sitting at my computer when I heard someone knocking on my door.
The hell?
I headed downstairs and took a peek and saw what looked to be my neighbor. I turned on the light, opened the door, and confirmed this. He’d come by to tell me that my dome light was on in my car.
That meant that it’d been on for roughly six hours by that point.
D’oh.
I went to the car and found that the seatbelt was caught in the door, holding it slightly ajar.
I removed the seatbelt and properly closed the door, deciding that if there were problems with the battery I would deal with them the next day.
Yesterday afternoon I went out to the car, put the key in the ignition, and it started right up, so I figured I was good.
This morning? Not so much.
It came very close to starting a couple of times, but didn’t quite make it.
I stepped away from it for a few minutes, went back into the house and packed up some snacks for work, and then was going to knock on the neighbors’ door to see if they had jumper cables and would be willing to give me a boost.
Before doing that, though, I decided to try again.
It started up with no hesitation. Guess it just needed to warm up a little. Hopefully there won’t be any issues tomorrow morning.

It Really Is A Small World After All Department:
So every few days OK Cupid puts some “matches” in my “Quiver.” Basically there’s a search bot that scours the member profiles in search of someone who matches the search criteria I’ve selected.
Unlike other dating sites, you can’t get terribly specific with your search criteria. You’re pretty much limited to selecting an age range, whether you’re looking for a man or a woman, whether you want them to be looking for a man or a woman, and setting an acceptable distance from your location.
With sites like match.com you can also specify race, body type, hair color, language, religious beliefs, smoking/drinking preferences, etc.
Presumably that sort of stuff is covered by the personality profile that OK Cupid creates based on how you answer questions. At least, I’m assuming that’s why you can’t specify them in your search.
In any case, for distance from my location, my choice is 25 miles, which is the shortest distance you can select.
So today I got an e-mail telling me that there were new “matches” in my Quiver. I said, “This should be good for a mirthless laugh,” and clicked on the instant login link.
I was surprised to see that one of them was actually kind of cute. I looked to see where she was located and noted that it said “Loudoun.” I thought, “Loudoun? Where in Loudoun?”
(Loudoun is the name of the county I live in)
Then I looked more closely. It didn’t say Loudoun, it said “London.”
I know they moved the London Bridge to Arizona years ago, but when did they move London itself to within 25 miles of Leesburg?
Oh wait; they didn’t. OK Cupid is just dumb.
And I thought that the “match” from over 70 miles away that I got the other day was bad.
I mean, seriously, it wasn’t even London, Ontario. Being off by 50 miles is one thing, but to match me with someone who lives on another continent entirely?
I can’t decide if it’s better or worse than matching me with someone who requires that potential matches DO NOT have a penis.