Adventures In Amateur Sex Re-Assignment

When I did laundry (socks) yesterday, I never bothered taking them out of the dryer and putting them away, so this morning after I took a shower and was getting dressed I just grabbed a pair directly from the dryer.
One of the cool things about my apartment, aside from the simple fact that I actually have my own washer and dryer, is that it has a decently-sized laundry room to contain the washer and dryer.
As I was on my way out after grabbing the socks, I realized that I had left the dryer door open and considered turning around and closing it, at least partially, but I was already nearly out of the laundry room, so I left it the way it was and closed the laundry room door behind me.
It is, however, worth mentioning that I did take note of the fact that the dryer door was open.
Among the things I purchased when I went grocery shopping were bleach, laundry detergent, and fabric softener.
After I got home I put away the perishable items and turned my attention to the laundry items.
I grabbed the bleach, opened the door to the laundry room, and walked in, my eyes turned upward toward the shelf on the wall to determine where I was going to put the bleach.
The fact that the dryer door was open, at a 90 degree angle, had slipped my mind…right up until I felt it driving its way into my groin.
Fortunately my reaction time was sufficient to prevent this from turning into an impromptu gender-reassignment surgery, but it was representative of the way that I frequently set myself up, sometimes well in advance, for painful encounters with inanimate objects.
Sometimes, as a result of similar, previous encounters, I will take note of the possibility of such an occurrence and take steps to forestall it.
For example, I have a TV in my bedroom. While I’m not certain why (or motivated enough to find out), I have noted that the cable outlet in the room does not appear to actually transmit a signal.
Perhaps because I don’t get cable, I almost never watch TV in my bedroom anyway, but on those occasions on which I do, I do so by making use of rabbit ears.
On one such occasion I discovered an optimal set up for the rabbit ears that would allow me to pull in the maximum number of channels with the maximum clarity. This set up involved leaving one of the “ears” set at about a 45 degree angle. I thought about just leaving it that way for any time in the future in which I might decide to watch TV in the bedroom, saving myself the trouble of having to realign the antenna.
Because it was pointing to the side of the TV this seemed innocuous enough.
However, I was naturally suspicious and opted to make a quick test of just how innocuous it really was.
The test demonstrated that if I were to grab something from my dresser and turn quickly, when not wearing glasses, I would catch the antenna right in the eye.
Naturally I folded the rabbit ears up and pushed them completely in to totally prevent any potential eye-gouging.
(Having suffered a stick in the eye as a kid, I tend to be a little overly cautious about this sort of thing)
So this was an instance in which I did actually prepare for a future problem.
Today we saw one, which is much more common, for which I was not prepared, even though I had something of a premonition about it being a problem (when I had briefly considered closing the door).
There was a time when I thought that these kinds of mishaps might very well be the source of a fair amount of my anger. After all, if I weren’t constantly banging my head against doors or stabbing myself in the arm (did that in cooking class yesterday) or setting off land mines (I really ought to stop leaving them lying around the apartment), I might very well be a slightly more pleasant, cheerful person.
...
Well, it was a theory, anyway.
To test the theory a while back I decided that every action I engaged in would be very carefully considered. I would make no quick or careless moves, leaving as little as possible to chance, hoping that I would thereby eliminate at least the majority of painful and aggravating accidents and mishaps.
What I discovered is that very carefully and deliberately considering everything I do is irritating as hell, so at the end of the day I was even more pissed off than usual. Worse, it didn’t really do all that much to cut down on the number of bumps, cuts, and contusions I suffered.
So it seems that my life is fated to be like some sort of slapstick comedy gone horribly awry.
Ah well, at least all of you can get a laugh out of it.
Tomorrow I’m off to the dentist again to have my new crown put in, and a temporary crown put on another tooth. Fun stuff.
It will be strange to not have to turn in early on a Thursday. I don’t think I’ve taken time off since last December.
The next time (a full weekend, which translates to 11 days off) will be in May, when I head home for Jourdan’s graduation.
In any case, that’ll do it for this entry. Tune in tomorrow when we'll be that much closer to Sin City Day.