Pointless Thoughts On Xenosexuality

Though I don’t think that it’s legitimately an issue to discuss, since, as mentioned, the supposed subtext (outside of the costume) didn’t exist, I couldn’t help but find myself thinking about the topic of Superman’s supposed homosexuality.
A question occurred to me:  given that, despite outward appearances, he is not human, and further is the only surviving member of his species, is it even possible for him to be a homosexual?
Further, does the fact that he gravitates toward human females actually make him heterosexual?
From a certain perspective, given the relative differences in evolutionary advancement having sex with any human – male or female – could be considered bestiality.
Just a thought.
Author Larry Niven – who actually wrote an infamous essay about the mechanics of Superman mating with a human female entitled Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex – uses the term rishathra to describe sexual congress between members of different sentient species.
Of course, the notion of rishathra is predicated on the assumption that the species would not be able to actually breed, therefore making it a non-reproductive act performed simply for pleasure, as a means of formalizing treaties, or for various other reasons not related to procreation.
After all, the existence of compatible parts doesn’t necessarily mean that breeding can occur.  If reproductive sexual intercourse is not possible between a Kryptonian and a human, is orientation even an issue?
Of course, if it is possible, then it follows that despite his evolutionary advancements, Superman would technically qualify as a viable male partner for a human female, thus making an inclination towards the female of the species the more “natural” orientation, particularly given that, as the last of his kind, his biological imperative to reproduce is considerably stronger than his human male counterparts.
I suppose you could say that it’s as much stronger than a human males imperative as his physical strength is compared to a normal man’s.
As an aside, looking at things solely in terms of the genetics, every woman with an ounce of sense should be vying for his seed, as his genes are superior to those of every other male.
Anyway, I was just pointlessly thinking about the implications of referring to an alien as a homosexual.
Given that in the comics he is married to a woman and does engaged in what can be considered heterosexual (his alien nature aside) sexual acts with said woman and does not demonstrate an attraction to men or engage in sexual activities with men, he is clearly not gay.
If anything, General Zod is the gay one.  I mean, you think Superman’s outfit is fruity, check out his Mr. Fabulous with his Fag Hag and his big, dumb butch.  Further, he was portrayed in the movie by a guy who went on to appear in Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.
And why do you think he got sentenced to the Phantom Zone/Retarded Floating Mirror That Someone Should Be Punished For Coming Up With in the first place?  Hello?  He was in the military.  Even Krypton hadn’t evolved beyond the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy.
Plus, why do you think he was so keen to have the son of Jor-El “kneel before Zod” anyway?
Of course, I recognize that the reality of the situation (if there can be said to be such a thing) is that most people aren’t saying that Superman, or Batman, or Aquaman (well, maybe not Aquaman), or whoever is literally gay, but that these characters are metaphorically or allegorically gay, so that they are presented as being as being straight (barring some truly bizarre moments of writerly naiveté or even prankserism in the Golden and Silver Age, most of which only raise eyebrows when viewed in hindsight with a cynical eye) isn’t actually a consideration.
That Superman doesn’t actually smoke pole, you might say, if, like me, you wanted to be crude about it, doesn’t mean that he doesn’t smoke pole via a wink wink and a nudge nudge.
So, I say whatever.  If you really want to spend time tacking on gay themes thought jaded viewings of stories from simpler times written for a simpler audience, go ahead and waste your time, though I would submit that you might be better served to dedicate your time to examining the increasing (though still admittedly small) number of characters that have actual gay themes.
After all, changing times have made it possible for (at least some) characters to come out of the closet.  You don’t have to look for the hidden (and often imaginary) symbology; you can actually see it explicitly stated.
Like I said earlier, just a thought.
On the other side of things, personally, I think that most of the gay characters out there are actually straight.  The new Batwoman being a lesbian?  It’s just a cover.  She’s totally a closeted straight chick….
I forgot to mention one other thing I did actually like about Superman Returns:  the flying.
Not just the whizzing along at tremendous speeds and making sonic booms, but the gentle floating.  There were a lot of scenes of him just taking to the air without putting on a big production.  No taking a few steps or getting a running start, just straight up floating up into the air as if it were the most natural thing in the world, which, for him, it is.
Today it actually stopped raining and we had some sunshine.  It didn’t last, as we eventually got a few downpours and some rumblings of thunder, but I think it managed to dry up a little bit out there.
Not that it really mattered to me, as I didn’t do a goddamn thing all day.
I pretty much just sat around and read (Angels & Demons for those of you wondering) all day long.
As a result of my indolence I really don’t have much else to report, so I’ll just leave you with this thought:
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Hmm.  You think you could do me a favor?  Come up with your own thought.  I got nothing.
Thanks.