Just a bit ago I had a knock on my door.
It was an investigator from the Department of Defense performing a background check on the guy who used to live across the hall from me, who is apparently applying for a job that requires some kind of security clearance or something.
This happened once before, though that time the investigator was a chick and she was pretty hot. This time around it was a guy and he...well, wasn't.
Just like the female investigator, this guy wouldn't take "I don't know who you're talking about" for an answer.
As he talked about him, I was able to dredge up some memories - of the guy's wife. She was a little hottie who rode horses, and frequently when I'd look out my door I'd see her in these tight little riding pants bending over to take off her muddy boots before going into their apartment.
So she stands out in my memory.
I honestly don't remember ever even seeing him.
Still, I was able to inform the investigator that they were pretty quiet people, they didn't appear to be dealing drugs, the police never had to stop by, and that I never observed any foreign nationals hanging around.
Of course, as I was trying to remember him, I was sort of doing so out loud, so I made a few references to having noticed the wife.
I'm sure my name is in some file from the last time, so now the DoD not only has it on record that I don't socialize with my neighbors enough to even know their names or what they look like, they can now conclude that I'm also a creep who scopes out other men's wives (and maybe I am, but the government doesn't need to know that).
At this point, I don't think I could look any more suspicious if I grew a ratty beard and started writing manifestoes...
2 comments:
that's kinda freaky, does the DoD make checks like that on every one who applies a for a job with goverment clearance? Man, I wonder what they got when they searched me out...
I'm not certain how often they do the checks. I would assume it only happens at a certain level of clearance.
Given my proximity to DC, though, I'm surprised I've only had this happen twice.
Years ago, when I was in high school, so back in the Stone Age, my brother had a background check done (he's in the Navy)when he was starting at the Pentagon. They never talked to our family, though.
The other DoD person I talked to (the hot chick) said that they never talk to families.
That's too bad, as I'd had a plan to totally sabotage my brother. I was going to leave copies of "The Anarchist's Cookbook" and "The Communist Manifesto" lying around, and then talk about my brother's generosity, pointing to the books he'd given me...
No, of course I wouldn't have really done it, but it was fun to come up with ideas when I knew he was being checked out.
Post a Comment