The Universe is 6,014 years old today. Did you remember to buy it a present?
Okay, some context.
Back in the 17th Century, relying primarily on the Bible's listings of genealogy, in addition to some extra-biblical sources, Bishop James Ussher reckoned that the Universe was created, on this date, in 4004 BC.
You know what would be an awesome birthday present? For people to stop believing that this bullshit is true and that it can serve as a reasonable basis for, well, anything.
It is, after all, no longer the 17th Century, and we have a little more information to work from than a listing of who begat who in a book written in in the freakin' Bronze Age.
Just a thought.