Thursday, March 13, 2008

Damn The Torpedoes

Today was a long, busy day, full of scheduled and impromptu meetings and conference calls, and I was glad to see the end of it, particularly given that tomorrow is Friday.
On Wednesday my boss told me that I have to face the fact that I’m never going to get used to the whole five day work week thing. He has a point.
I mean, seriously, by Wednesday I’d put in three days: what more do they want from me?
What? Two more days? *Sigh* Okay…
After work today, on Kathleen’s invitation, I headed over to her bank, which was celebrating its grand opening in Leesburg today. The main draw? Free food.
When I got there, I found that that they were providing valet parking…and that Kathleen wasn’t there yet.
This was an issue because there were a lot of people – people I didn’t know – crowded into a very small space. So after getting my name tag and being greeted by the branch manager I went outside to call Kathleen and learned that she wasn’t too far away.
Back inside some guy saw me standing alone looking awkward and took pity on me, which was nice of him, but he wasn’t really the most dynamic conversationalist. Luckily Kathleen arrived shortly after that, and then proceeded to introduce me to a bunch of people who, while nice enough, clearly didn’t give two shits about who I was.
But whatever.
They had some sort of drawing in which people put their business cards in a bucket (Note to self: remember to talk to the admin about getting business cards), which Kathleen actually won. Apparently she’s been lucky in the “winning gift baskets” category of life lately, as she recently won a gift basket at one of her networking meetings.
Somewhere along the line the branch manager came and “borrowed” Kathleen to bring her to talk to some other people, and I went back to standing around awkwardly.
Eventually, after I’d taken out my cell phone to close some of the open applications, some other guy took pity on me and struck up a conversation based on the fact that we both had the same model of cell phone.
After he left, Kathleen made her way over and said that she wanted to do some more schmoozing, and I decided to head home.
And that was the day’s excitement.
(The Mayor of Leesburg was there. I had no idea that the Mayor was a woman, or really, any ideas about the Mayor at all, as I tend not to pay any attention to that sort of thing. I note that the Mayor was a woman not because I found it shocking, or that I fainted dead away after saying, “A woman Mayor? Now I’ve seen everything!” but rather because it brought to mind a line from the song God is in the House by Nick Cave: We have a pretty little square, we have a woman for a Mayor, our policy is firm but fair, now that God is in the house.)
In terms of the quality of the women in attendance at the event, feel it appropriate to quote the Sea Captain from The Simpsons: “Yarr, not a looker in the bunch.”
There was one woman there who was kind of sort of almost maybe attractive. She was definitely dressed to accentuate her best assets, or more appropriately, tittets, as she was wearing a very tight top that showcased her breasts, giving her these huge 1950’s style torpedo boobs. If I were any shorter she might have put one of my eyes out with those things.
However, while her top did wonders for that part of her, it also made her bulge in some unfortunate places.
I’m no good at guessing age, but I would estimate that she was at least a few years older than I am, and I think that I’d have to classify her as a cougar, a notion reinforced by a conversation I overheard her having with some other women who were encouraging her to pounce on some young prey she’s evidently been stalking.
Speaking of aging not-so gracefully, I realized that as of today my birthday is exactly a month away.
I wouldn’t normally care – it is a “pointless” age, after all, one of those in-between birthdays that isn’t any sort of milestone – but I’m a little more excited about my upcoming birthday, as this year my mom will be out for a visit. I’m looking forward to having her out here to see my house and meet my friends. I’d be even more excited if my dad were still around to come out with her, but I guess that’s just a birthday present that I’ll have to do without.
But speaking of birthday presents, if someone were of a mind to buy me something, I wouldn’t be averse to some of these, or maybe this, though of course, as always, I’m clearly not dropping birthday gift hints when I mention that Superman Family #171, the first comic book I remember ever looking at, is available for purchase at Mile High Comics (though the Very Fine copy is out of stock, which couldn’t possibly be because someone bought it for me thinking that I’ve been dropping hints to that effect), or that a case like this would be great to display it in.
In any case, the monstrosity that is the five day work week still needs to be completed, so bed time approaches, and I will bring this entry to a close.

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