This Homage Is More Like Fromage

I said yesterday that I'm not especially given to nostalgia about most things.
For the most part that's true, but there are some thing that can still stir up fondly recalled memories.
Regular readers know that one such stirrer of fondly recalled memories is the comic book series The New Teen Titans and that said memories are among the very fondest.
So when I was digging through my storage area today and spotted an old Titans comic, it's hardly surprising that I picked it up and began thumbing through it.
When I spotted the Starfire pin-up by George Perez in the back, I decided that it would be a good piece to use for a color exercise.
(It also made a convenient excuse to not go back to work on the picture I'd started yesterday, which is pissing me off and which I'm reluctant to return to working on.)
Of course, whenever I attempt exercises in which the goal is to try out new techniques I invariably fall back into the same old patterns and use the same old tricks.
I mostly avoided that here, though while the idea was to simply scan in the original, convert it to black and white, clean it up a little, and then just color it, I ended up totally redrawing it, though I did at least make use of the techniques for coloring that I'd intended to try out.
In any case, here is the end result:



It basically looks the way I wanted it to look; as though George Perez pencilled it and I inked and colored it.
By way of comparison, here is the original, which comes from Tales of The New Teen Titans No. 4, September, 1982, unretouched:



The main thing I learned from this exercise was something I already knew: I'm no George Perez.

Clean Sheets + New Bed = Late Morning

The lethal combination of a comfortable bed and clean sheets made it difficult for me to get up this morning.
Not that I really had much of a reason to do so, but ultimately I decided that I should.
The only plans I had for the day were to stop by the fire station to visit Kathleen, who was running a rummage sale benefiting the fire department.
When I decided to take the weekend off I’d sent her an e-mail telling her that I was going to be off should she want to do something, but received a response about the rummage sale asking if I wanted to help out with it.
Admittedly my own plans, or total lack thereof, for my vacation time were less than exciting, but that didn’t mean that I was looking to spice things up by working at a rummage sale.
I told her that  would stop by to harass her by haggling with her over the price of things that I had no intention of buying.
She responded with, “Maybe you could be my food bitch and bring me a bagel.”
I responded with, “Maybe you could kiss my ass.”
Later she suggested that I could make peanut butter cookies – I used to make them a lot and bring them in to work to share with everyone – as I haven’t done that in a long time.
I decided that was acceptable, though it meant that I had to go out and buy some peanut butter yesterday.
At the store I got in line at the self-checkout behind an extremely tall woman who was very pretty but no figure whatsoever.  That she was so tall just drew attention to how incredibly skinny she was.  Given that she was the mother of at least the two kids she had with her – one of whom was probably less than a year old – I was amazed that it was even possible for her to be that skinny.
After she finished paying and was on her way I was puzzled when the self-checkout told me “Please remove your items.”  I looked down and saw that she had actually left her groceries behind after paying for them, so I called out to her and got her attention just before she got to the door.  She laughed embarrassedly and thanked me.
She had a very pretty smile, but being so stick-figure thin kept her from being as attractive as she could be.
In any case, I made the cookies yesterday afternoon and set aside the majority of them in a container, which I brought with me to the rummage sale this morning.
I had a look around, but there wasn’t much of interest for me there.  I did buy a little frying pan, as I’ve been intending to buy a smaller frying pan for a while now.
Kathleen, who was very pleased to get the cookies, was there with some generic nice old ladies of the kind that you could find at any sort of volunteer/church function in any town in America who were off on their own having a little coffee klatch and whom Kathleen introduced to me as simply, “The Ladies.”
“The Ladies” provided me with lunch but refused any payment for it so I just put some money into the donation jar.
After visiting for a while I said, “Well, I’m going to pretend like I have things to do today,” grabbed my frying pan, and left Kathleen and “The Ladies” to their customers.
And that’s been my day so far.  Since I’ve gotten home I’ve been looking at the bed and remembering how comfortable it was.  I don’t foresee myself accomplishing much this afternoon.

It Might Have Been Nice To Have Plans To Not Follow Through With

Because I knew that I wouldn’t be going, having no reason to believe, at the time that I learned about it that tonight would be anything other than a work night, I forgot that Neil Gaiman was going to be in DC doing a reading and signing.
Of course, had I remembered sooner it’s not as though I would have driven in to DC on a Friday night by myself anyway, but it might have been nice to remember that there was something that I could have potentially done with my time off.
In fact, I could have planned to make a night of it and gotten a hotel room, as the National Book Festival is tomorrow.
Again, I wouldn’t have done that, but it would have been nice to be able to consider it.
Oh well.
There’s nobody at the Book Festival that I want to see this year.  The only name I really recognized was Brad Meltzer, the bestselling author of The Book of Fate and current writer of the latest incarnation of the Justice League of America.
Meltzer also wrote the controversial Identity Crisis mini-series for DC a while back, a storyline that pretty much shook the DC Universe to its foundation.
It was an interesting and compelling story, but has proven to be one that has had some rather unfortunate side effects and spawned a lot of really, really bad story ideas.
So far I haven’t been impressed by his work on Justice League either.  Despite the more “adult” turn, it seems to be caught up in nostalgia as it attempts to hearken back to the last days of comics’ Silver Age while still maintaining a modern sensibility.  It just doesn’t quite work, and it seems rather fanboyish to me.
You would think I would find it a little more appealing.  After all, Meltzer and I are roughly the same age, and the cherished stories of his childhood are likely to be the same cherished stories of mine, but there just seems to be a disconnect somewhere that prevents me from really enjoying it.  Maybe it’s because I’m not especially nostalgic about most things.
Beyond that, though, while there have been a lot of things that have gone wrong in comics in the last 20 years or so, there have also been a lot of things that have gone right, and I find myself distressed to see some of those ideas and developments tossed aside to return to old, abandoned concepts, particularly when the only motivation for doing so seems to be a desire to satisfy the inner fanboys of the creative teams.
Anyway, the point is that Meltzer just isn’t enough of a draw to make me want to go to the Festival.
Knowing that I was on vacation, my friend Kevin called last night.
I wasn’t especially talkative because…well, because I just wasn’t especially talkative, and, quite frankly, it can be difficult to think of things to say to someone who reads my blog.  I mean, what can I tell you about what’s going in my life that you didn’t just read about?
Still, it is nice, despite my general lack of nostalgia, to have people from another time in your life still want to maintain contact.  There are so few people like that in my life.
Basically there’s Kevin.
Well, there’s also “Zalfiro,” but he was part of my life more recently.
Of course I do generally get in touch with Gretchen when I go home.
So three people.
But that’s okay.  
It’s not that there aren’t other people that I’d like to have some contact with, but really I just don’t see the point.  Besides, outside of Kevin and a few others, most of the people in my past were people who were involved with me solely during the worst periods of my drinking, and as such being in contact with them wouldn’t be especially healthy.
Speaking of which, my niece Jourdan, whom I mentioned earlier, recently moved out of her apartment (located, coincidentally, directly below Kevin’s), and into a house with several other people.
My mother had described the house briefly and it sounded familiar.  I asked her for a little more information on it and it turns out that it’s a house that a couple of my friends from that period had lived in.  It was just a short distance from where I lived, and I actually spent many a drunken hour there.
I’d say there is a good chance that the place is haunted by some drunken aspect of my spirit.
Still, it’s not too terribly surprising that Jourdan would first move into the same building as a friend of mine and then move into a house where other friends of mine used to live given that when it comes to the U.P. the phrase “small world” doesn’t even come close to giving you a true sense of scale.

No One Is Ever Around To Hear My Best Material Department:
A while ago I was in the kitchen fixing a snack when I heard a commercial for a video game on the TV.
The announcer’s voice said, “Welcome to The Third Street Saints.  Rated M for Mature.”
I responded instantly with “Kiss My Ass.  Rated E for Everyone.”
…
At least I laughed.

I've Made My Bed And Am Ready To Lie In It

I was out and about trying to decide where I was going to go for lunch when my phone rang.
It was the delivery guy saying that they're running ahead of schedule and would it be okay if they delivered my bed in the next 45 minutes or so. I said it was fine and made my way home to wait.
It was actually closer to an hour before they arrived, but that still put them two hours earlier than originally scheduled, so that's okay, and it only took them about 15 minutes to haul out the old bed and put together the new.
Here it is just after assembly:



It's actually pretty close to a foot higher than my old bed, so that's definitely going to take some getting used to.
Having a headboard will also require some adjustment, I think.
The reason I wanted a headboard, by the way, was not to handcuff anyone to it (for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is that I'm unlikely to find anyone to handcuff to it any time...well, ever), but rather to keep the wall from getting stained by the dye from my sheets and pillowcases as they rub against it, as had happened in my old apartment and was beginning to happen here.
I briefly considered buying a new set of sheets for the new bed, but ultimately decided that clean sheets were sufficient.
Years ago when my niece Jourdan was little and had recently made the transition from crib to bed, my sister bought her this little kid-sized brass bed. After it was put together, Jourdan excitedly got onto it and said, in her cutely tortured toddler English, "Anybody doesn't have a bed like me, huh mom?" by which she meant to say that nobody had a bed like hers; that it must be special.
(Saying "anybody" in place of "nobody" was just one of her many idioms as a kid. Other favorites of mine were "yogrit" for "yogurt" and "I'm sweating/thirsty to heck.")
I'm pretty sure that anybody does have a bed like mine, but even so, I am pleased with it and look forward to testing it out under "field conditions" tonight.
Still too damned expensive for something that doesn't even have a motherboard, though.

The Grocery Store Of My Dreams?

Scott sent me this link to the Web page of a grocery store that could quite possibly be the ideal shopping experience for me.
From the page:

Because self-checkout has a 12-item limit, you will have three minutes. There is no way scanning 12 measly bar codes should take you any longer. Our customers are busy, and have no time for slowpokes. We’ve all had the experience of standing behind the jackass who can’t follow simple instructions. It’s horrible and slows the pace considerably, leading to many overturned shopping carts.
At SADISCO we’ve gone out of our way to educate the customer. After a mere 3 seconds of inactivity, the status screen begins to flash while the speakers boom: SHOPPING AT SADISCO IS A PRIVELIDGE (sic) NOT A RIGHT, BEGIN SCANNING IMMEDIATELY OR FACE PUBLIC SHAMING.
FOUR.
THREE.
TWO.
ONE.
ZERO.
HOW DOES IT FEEL TO FAIL AT BUYING GROCERIES?

If a store like this really existed I would totally shop there.

It Would Have Been Cheaper To Go Somewhere On Vacation

A casual observer who was just tuning in to my life for the first time today might jump to the conclusion that I enjoy spending large amounts of money.
This casual observer, in addition to being bored out of his or her skull by the banal nature of my existence, would be dead wrong, however, as, despite appearances, I do not enjoy spending large amounts of money.
Let me just say that for something to which the terms “HD,” “LCD,” “Wi-Fi,” or “Core Duo” do not apply, beds are ungodly expensive.
In any case, after getting up, having breakfast, and steeling myself for dropping a big chunk of cash, I headed off in search of a mattress store.
On my way out the door I heard the woman upstairs locking her door, which meant that I was leaving just in time to avoid listening to her dog mourn her absence.
It also meant that I finally got a pretty clear look at her. When I’d seen her before she was largely hiding behind the door, prepared to slam it in my face on a moment’s notice (which is the position I would expect pretty much any woman living alone – even with a big dog – to assume if I came knocking on her door, even though I am perfectly harmless and not nearly so creepy as I might appear), so I while she seemed reasonably attractive I’d never gotten a good look at her body.
I have to say, with some reluctance, owing to the fact that my hatred of her dog has spilled over to her, that she’s not bad, not bad at all.
Anyway, after I left I got to the mattress store and was set upon by the woman working there who began the process of helping me narrow down what I was looking for.
I have to say that lying down on a bed inside of a store with a salesperson hovering over you isn’t the most comfortable way to spend your time, though she did go off to help some other customers, which allowed me to relax a little more and thereby more accurately gauge the comfort level of the two mattress types I’d narrowed my selection down to.
Eventually I decided that while one was slightly more comfortable than the other it was not, as the saleslady put it, “$100 more comfortable,” and so I opted for the cheaper, slightly less comfortable mattress with the pillow top rather than the “plush” top and which lacked the titanium bands that provide some sort of additional back support.
While I was at it I figured that I might as well buy a headboard, as my current bed is lacking one.
So as I pointed out to Scott I will now have something to handcuff women to, though of course I’m still lacking one major component.
However, Scott pointed out that I am at least 50% of the way there, though he wasn’t aware of the fact that I also have handcuffs, and so am actually 66% of the way there.
Anyway, to stray back out of TMI territory, the grand total came to just shy of a whopping $900.
*Sigh*
During yesterday’s cleaning frenzy I decided that my 20th Century vacuum cleaner was not up to the task of cleaning in the 21st Century and so needed to be replaced.
Of course, that was before I’d decided on buying a new bed and had just dropped close to a grand on one.
However, I decided that in for a penny, in for a pound…or more accurately, in for $900, in for over a grand, and so I went over to Super Target to pick one out.
I was surprised to discover that until you start straying into Dyson territory vacuums aren’t really as expensive as I expected them to be. Since my cleaning needs aren’t quite so extreme as to require a Dyson. After all, I don’t have any pets, and so I don’t have the need for that extreme pet hair removing power, though it occurs to me that if you have a pet hair problem serious enough that you need to consider buying a Dyson there’s a solution that doesn’t require dropping $500-600 on a vacuum cleaner.
But that’s jus me.
Anyway, I was able to get off pretty cheaply, compared to my earlier purchase at least, opting for a Eureka that was priced pretty well in the middle between the high and low end, and which can be seen here:



Once I got home and assembled it I decided that it was time for lunch. I hadn’t gotten lunch while I was out because I didn’t have any cash on me and really wasn’t sure what I wanted anyway.
A few weekends ago at work, though, I’d made a late-morning trip over to the and when I was walking from the store back to my car I smelled chicken.
This isn’t unusual as there is a Popeye’s nearby.
What was unusual was the fact that it smelled like KFC, enough so that it made me want KFC and resolve that within the next few days I would have some.
Out here in VA I’ve noticed that KFC tends to be paired with Taco Bell, and last week when I wrote about driving around Leesburg looking for a place to have lunch, that had come about from me thinking that the Taco Bell here in Leesburg was paired with a KFC. However, it’s paired with a Pizza Hut, and I learned later that there isn’t a KFC anywhere in Leesburg.
So today, after I was finished with the vacuum I decided to head to the KFC in Ashburn, after which I headed to Wal-Mart to pick up a few things I hadn’t gotten at Super Target.
Among them was the DVD of Bound, a great movie that would be great even if it didn’t feature hot girl on girl action, but it does feature hot girl on girl action so it’s an even greater movie than it already was. Lots of interesting pre-Matrix camera work from the Wachowski Brothers.
I grabbed it because it was on the $7.50 rack and I thought, “Why not?”
While I was grabbing it I noticed that Army of Darkness was also on the cheap rack.
I love this movie but don’t own it because there are like a zillion different versions of it, so I’ve never been able to decide which version to buy. Today I decided to just say “Screw it” and buy the cheap version.
While I was at it I also grabbed a copy of the director’s cut of Donnie Darko.
So not everything I bought today was utilitarian and boring, though I find it odd that the coolest stuff I bought was also the cheapest.
Oh well.
I won’t actually get the bed until tomorrow. I have a delivery window of 3-5.
At least they’ll set it up for me and haul away the old bed.
And anyway, for all my expense I got a new bed and a new vacuum cleaner! Who says that I don’t know how to party like a rock star?
*Sigh*
In any case, my KFC lunch was long enough ago that it’s time I start figuring out what I’m going to have for dinner.

Not Quite Obsessively Clean, But Still Pretty Clean

After sitting around for a bit and talking to my mother I built up enough motivation to get started on the whole thorough cleaning thing.
It wasn’t exactly scrubbing with a  toothbrush thorough, but it was at least getting down on my hands and knees and cleaning the baseboards thorough (And yes mother; I did wash the windows).
As I was in the midst of it all I did consider calling up Brian and finding out what maid service he and Kathleen use, but ultimately decided against it.
Speaking of Brian, after I’d finished cleaning the bathroom and had made a good dent in the bedroom I decided to take time out for lunch.
I discovered that Oscar Meyer went all out by actually including the same number of wieners as there are hot dog puns in their bun length wieners.
I also discovered that one package can make for three meals for me.  Three monotonous meals.
So just as I was about to launch into meal number three, my phone beeped and Brian invited me out to lunch.
As I’d been in the process of transferring dirt from the condo to me, I needed to take a quick shower.
I did so, then headed out to meet Brian.
In the waitress department we had two options:  a cute, skinny waitress, and a not-so cute, not so skinny waitress.
I’ll leave it up to you to guess which one we got.
(Hint:  It wasn’t the cute, skinny one.)
Afterwards I headed back home and picked up where I’d left off with the cleaning, only to have my phone beep again a while later.
It was Brian again.  He was having work done on his truck that was going to take a few hours so he wanted me to pick him up and give him a ride home.
I’d been just about to put a load of laundry in but hadn’t gotten to it yet so I was able to grab the clothes I’d worn out earlier and headed off to pick him up.
I wasn’t entirely sure where the garage was, so it was hardly surprising when my phone beeped and Brian said, “Yeah, you just went right past me.”
I turned around and went past again, but managed to turn into an adjacent parking lot.
After dropping him off at home I made my way back to the cleaning.
It didn’t take too much longer (I decided to hold off on the organizing portion until tomorrow), and now my place is sparking and smells all fresh and clean and slightly burnt, as I also set the oven to self-clean while I was working on the rest of the place.
At one point I’d actually forgotten that I set the oven to clean, and was becoming increasingly concerned about that burning smell for a while before eventually realizing that I’m an idiot.
I never tackled the tangled mess of wires behind my desk and I don’t think I will.  I think I’m going to remain content to have them out of sight even if they are a huge, tangled mess that drives me just a little bit crazy because even though I can’t see it I know that it’s there.
It doesn’t keep me up nights, though, so I can live with it.
Speaking of being up nights, or rather, not being up nights, I’ve been thinking that I might use my vacation time to buy a new bed.
Sure, I could do that without being on vacation, but when you consider that I’ll be spending a significant amount of money, as one generally does on vacation, and will ultimately be sleeping in an unfamiliar bed, it’s sort of like actually going on vacation.
Okay, not really, but it’s as close as I’m likely to get to actually doing something.
I’ve held off on buying a new bed even though I’ve wanted one for a while simply because it is a lot of money to pay for something that doesn’t even have RAM.
Sure, I’ll get plenty of use out of it, but it’s a safe bet that none of that use will be any fun.
Still, I am pretty tired of the crappy bed I have, so I guess it’s time to finally take the plunge.
In any case, the fact that I spent pretty much the entire day cleaning means that I didn’t do anything else of note, so I guess that will do it for this entry.

Well Hellooo-is!

It had been my intention to create more of a background for this picture of Eric Durance, TV's Lois Lane, but I couldn't come up with a suitable replacement for the godawful green carpet and green wall that featured the CW Network's yellow logo, though almost anything would be better than that lemon-lime disaster. Ultimately I decided that she didn't need any kind of fancy backdrop. I mean, just look at her.



This picture is from that set of pictures from the CW launch party that I mentioned the other day, though it's not the one that featured her sexy shadow.
But while all of the pictures of her from that set were good, I decided that this one was the best, despite the lack of a sexy shadow as her curvy but streamlined figure more than makes up for it.

No Stick-To-Itiveness

Apparently last week Scott and Stacy were in a store when they saw this and decided that I could not go another day without having it in my possesion and so they bought it for me:



I will say this much about it; at least they used "real" art for it rather than having some hack crank out some images for it.
The stickers are of actual artwork from various series, featuring work by comic artists such as Phil Jimenez, Adam Hughes, and Brian Bolland.
Still, though the stickers can be used more than once, so far I haven't used them even that many times, despite the fact that it comes with pages with backdrops against which you can arrange the stickers to stage epic battles...or, you know, put Lois Lane, Catwoman, and Wonder Woman together in hot girl on girl on girl action.

It Sounds Vaguely Akin To The Primate Section At A Zoo

For the past couple weeks I’ve been finding that the thought that I should give the condo a really thorough cleaning, going so far as to reorganize the kitchen cabinets and straighten out my closet and an my storage area, and untangling the tangled mess of wires behind the computer desk and just generally give the whole thing the white glove treatment.
Immediately upon having this thought occur to me, though, it occurs to me that I really don’t want to do any of that.
Still, with all of the time I have off the odds of that happening have improved considerably, so we’ll see how it goes.
I woke up this morning convinced that it must be fairly late in the morning or possibly even early in the afternoon, but turned to the clock to discover that it wasn’t even 8:30.
I had woken up sometime in the early morning to discover that it had gotten extremely cold out and so, after stumbling to and from the bathroom, I closed the window and went back to sleep attempting to recapture whatever it was I had been dreaming about before waking up, though I was never successful. The dreams had something to do with something or other. I’m sure of that much.
In any case, having woken up at that time of day and hearing the rush of traffic going by on 15, as it was around the time that traffic starts to flow, left me disoriented and was the reason that I thought it was so much later than it actually was when I woke up for the day.
Once I got up I sat around doing my standard not much of anything for a while before showering and heading out into the world, with “the world” being Super Target.
One thing I’ve noticed about Super Target is that no matter where you go in the store, in addition to finding that the single most difficult thing in the world for Super Target customers to do is to not be in my goddamn way, is that the sounds of children are inescapable.
This isn’t entirely a complaint; just an observation.
Acoustics account for part of this – the layout of the store just causes sounds to carry – but the main reason is that when I’m there I’m pretty much the only customer who doesn’t have at least one kid with him and as a result the place is pretty much filled to overflowing with infants, toddlers, and pre-schoolers, which creates a cacophony of sounds ranging from idle gurgling to full-on high-pitched shrieks, with the occasional animalistic growling thrown in for good measure.
Given that the place is, therefore, equally filled to overflowing with stretch marks, varicose veins, and “that last five pounds of pregnancy fat,” it’s kind of unusual for the visuals to be any more appealing than the audio portion.
Which is why it was so surprising that I saw not one but two extremely well-shaped backsides during my brief visit.
The first was sighted immediately upon entering the store as I made my way towards the restroom. Not even grungy, loose-fitting, I’m-retaining-water-and-just-don’t-care-how-I-look sweat pants could rein in its bodaciousness. It was like she had a shelf sticking out from the back of her legs to support it: that ass defied gravity.
The second was spotted as I made my way to a register. This was a mom who managed to move “that last five pounds” around to the back and put it to good use.
Since I was going to have to wait in line anyway, I decided I’d get in line behind her to check out so that I could check out her behind, but fate was not on my side, as the cashier turned off her light before I got there and I was forced to move off to a different line where I desperately looked at anything other than the behind of the woman in front of me.
Anyway, moving on from the booty talk, I ended up spending more money than I expected to while I was at Super Target, though I didn’t even manage to buy anything cool.
The major expense was buying ink for my printer. I only needed black ink, but they had a two-pack of black and color ink for my printer that was enough of a bargain that I couldn’t pass it up.
I also picked up this 6-in-1 USB cable kit that has attachments for the various permutations of USB connections that I thought would be useful to have.
From there I came home, ate lunch, and had that cleaning thought occur to me, followed by having the attendant “I don’t wanna” thought occurring to me, at which point I sat down and wrote this riveting account of my day.
And there you have it.
I may be back later, but if I’m not I can assure you that you won’t be likely to be missing much.

I've Been Working On This Picture, All The Live-Long Day

Apart from taking time out to do some grocery shopping, make dinner, watch some TV, including the premiere of Heroes on NBC (My take on the show? Meh. I'll give it another shot next week.), I've pretty much spent the entire day working on this picture.



I'd like to say that the fact that I've spent a lot of time working on it shows, but I'm not sure my efforts really paid off.
I guess it turned out better than I expected.
I've actually had this image (or something like it, at any rate) in mind for a while. Why? Why not? I'm not into Anime or Manga, so obviously I'm not into tentacle porn, but for some reason the idea of Red Sonja in some kind of horrid, feculent pit of water with the tentacle of some monstrous dweller in said horrid, feculent pit breaking out of the water behind her seemed appropriate.
Make of it what you will.
I'm sure I'll be back with a regular entry tomorrow (or, more accurately, later today).

If Only I Could Take A Vacation From Being Me

Over the weekend at work I took a look at my leave balance and saw that I have 146 hours of time off available to me.
That comes to just shy of a month of available vacation time.
So, deciding that one weekend was as good as any other I decided to take next weekend off, which means that I now have 11 days’ worth of free time.
Somewhere along the line, assuming that I’m still working there much longer, as there has been no real news on that score, I’ll try to use up the rest of the time, or at least most of the rest of it.
But in the meantime, as mentioned, I’m on vacation.
Scott asked the obvious and inevitable question of me: What are you going to do with your time off?
I gave him the obvious and inevitable answer.
(If you don’t know what that answer is you obviously haven’t been paying attention)
I did have a dream last night that I decided to make use of the time off by driving to LA.
Why LA? Why not?
The dream trip to LA was about as exciting as a real trip to LA would likely be for me, which is to say that it was about as boring as it’s possible for anything to be.
In the dream I made the trip in a remarkably short period of time and checked into a cheap motel that had free wi-fi access and proceeded to essentially do what I would do at home, which is to say idly surf the Web and not do much of anything.
And of course I couldn’t stay long because I had to drive back in time to go to work once my time off was over.
I think the whole point of the dream was that my subconscious was telling me what I already know: no matter where I go, there I am.
Or, to put it another way, anyplace is just as boring as any other place when you’re Jon.
The most interesting thing about the dream was that while ostensibly I was in California it seemed much more like, say, Kansas than anything else, though I’ve never done anything more than simply go through Kansas, so I can’t say that with any real certainty.
In general it just seemed sort of Midwestern. At the very least it seemed a lot less glamorous and more out of date than you would expect California to be. It reminded me of the sort of version of California that you might see in a period piece set 4 or 5 decades in the past, though again, sort of lacking in glamour and glitz.
Maybe part of that is owing to the fact that I’ve been of a mind to see some of the period pieces that are out now, such as Hollywoodland and The Black Dahlia, but given the overall felling of familiarity I would say that it was just my subconscious trying to reinforce the message by making things drab and boring.
In any event it’s clear that I will not be taking a road trip to California.
Of course, somewhere underneath the realization that I won’t is the belief that maybe I should.
Not to California, necessarily, but somewhere.
Scott keeps throwing out the suggestion that I go to New Zealand and take one of those Lord of the Rings tours, simply because it amuses him to think of me surrounded by a bunch of 37 year old virgins with questionable hygiene and even more questionable connections to reality dressed up as Hobbits and Gandalf and god only knows what else and speaking Elvish to each other as we visit sites that were in the movies but where nothing actually happened.
Of course – again, assuming that I’m still employed – next year I’ll probably take the trip out to Tucson that I had intended to take this year before getting sidelined by the whole buying a condo thing.
This is going to be the last year that my parents go out there for the winter, so the last opportunity I’ll have to go there while I have a place to stay.
Not that I’ll do much while I’m there, but it will at least allow me to visit with my friend “Zalfiro.”
Last week I was talking to my dad who, on the topic of my uncertain employment, suggested jokingly that I get a job in politics seeing as how I’m near the center of them. I pointed out that next year I’ll be old enough to run for President.
Then I got depressed because I remembered that next year I’ll be old enough to run for President.
*Sigh*
A couple of days ago What Would Tyler Durden Do? posted some pictures of actress Erica Durance, who plays Lois Lane on Smallville, arriving at the launch party for the new CW Network.
Because she looked extremely hot (even more so than usual) I downloaded the pictures for future portrait use. Last night I quickly dashed off this picture



because I noted that even her shadow is sexy and thought that should be shared with the world (or at least the seven people who come here).
And on that note I think I’ll get back to enjoying my vacation, which is to say, get back to doing absolutely nothing.