From The Onion
Comic-Book Superrman Impervious To Copyediting
May 3, 2006 Issue 42•18
NEWARK—Executives at DCC Comics have announced the debut of comic-book character Superrman, whose invulnerability to copyediting protects him from nefarious outside forces and intellectual-property lawsuits. "Thrill to the exploits of Superrman, the only child of a doomed plant! Gasp in awe at his Superr-Strength, X-Roy Vision, and his ability to leap mall buildings in a single bounce!" read a press release issued by DCC. "Superrman's only weakness? His vulnerability to Cryptonight… and his star-crossed love for sassy, sexy, trouble-prone reporter Louis Lane!" The editors of Superrman say the comic book will be released alongside those of other popular DCC characters such as Wander Woman, the Flush, and Batdan.
Friday, May 05, 2006
Making Me Feel Better About My Mullet Years Department
I found this over at Peter David's siteand thought I would pass it along.
Thursday, May 04, 2006
Can't Post Now, Obsessing
All the stuff I’ve been doing on the whole Heroic Portraits front has kept me from posting any real entries this week. Sorry about that, but I don’t see it changing anytime real soon.
I’ve actually tapped into the more obsessive aspects of my personality and have been plugging away at different graphics for the site with a single-minded focus and intensity that leads me to do things like forget to eat as the hours whiz past me, which is okay, as I can afford to miss a few meals.
Earlier today, for example, I kept telling myself, “Okay, stop drawing, take a shower, and go get something to eat.” I finally listened to myself…three hours later.
The thing is, what I was working on was actually kind of…irrelevant. I mean, it’s cool (in its own way), but not really vital.
Still, I couldn’t help but devote time to it, as it’s an idea that’s been kicking around in my head for quite some time.
It was originally intended to be used as a visual aid for a Threshold post.
It actually will be used toward that purpose, but probably not until next week, as I need to finish the companion piece for it. I am actually oddly proud of it, though, so I wish I could post it now, but it just really wouldn’t work with out the other picture. Sorry.
Anyway, I never got around to working on it until now because I didn’t have enough motivation. Now I do (or rather, at this point, did) because it’s something that would also fit in very nicely at the Heroic Portraits gallery.
Sorry to be mysterious, but all will be revealed eventually.
There’s a lot more I could write about, but I want to get back to drawing while I still have time (bedtime is fast-approaching, especially since I’m going to get up even earlier in an effort to get back into the habit of working out).
I won’t be able to spend my time drawing at work (though I might end up recruiting Scott to help me design the Heroic Portraits site), so if things are slow enough I will most likely do some posting.
Until then, have a good weekend.
I’ve actually tapped into the more obsessive aspects of my personality and have been plugging away at different graphics for the site with a single-minded focus and intensity that leads me to do things like forget to eat as the hours whiz past me, which is okay, as I can afford to miss a few meals.
Earlier today, for example, I kept telling myself, “Okay, stop drawing, take a shower, and go get something to eat.” I finally listened to myself…three hours later.
The thing is, what I was working on was actually kind of…irrelevant. I mean, it’s cool (in its own way), but not really vital.
Still, I couldn’t help but devote time to it, as it’s an idea that’s been kicking around in my head for quite some time.
It was originally intended to be used as a visual aid for a Threshold post.
It actually will be used toward that purpose, but probably not until next week, as I need to finish the companion piece for it. I am actually oddly proud of it, though, so I wish I could post it now, but it just really wouldn’t work with out the other picture. Sorry.
Anyway, I never got around to working on it until now because I didn’t have enough motivation. Now I do (or rather, at this point, did) because it’s something that would also fit in very nicely at the Heroic Portraits gallery.
Sorry to be mysterious, but all will be revealed eventually.
There’s a lot more I could write about, but I want to get back to drawing while I still have time (bedtime is fast-approaching, especially since I’m going to get up even earlier in an effort to get back into the habit of working out).
I won’t be able to spend my time drawing at work (though I might end up recruiting Scott to help me design the Heroic Portraits site), so if things are slow enough I will most likely do some posting.
Until then, have a good weekend.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
I Think We Have A Winner
I did really like the second logo I came up with (to my mind it seems like the logo a comic book company might have up in the upper lefthand corner of the cover), but I'm really, really, REALLY liking the latest one with the cutouts. In fact, I tacked the URL onto the bottom of it and have put it up over at the Heroic Portraits site. Feel free to check it out.
While I am interested in your opinions, I don't think I can be dissuaded at this point, so ideally your opinion will be that you love it, period.
While I am interested in your opinions, I don't think I can be dissuaded at this point, so ideally your opinion will be that you love it, period.
Cutouts
So I had an idea for a little Flash animation (one which should be relatively easy to make) that I can put on the Heroic Portraits site.
I don't have the animation ready yet, but I do have the primary element of it, and I'm fairly proud of how it turned out, so I thought I would jump the gun and share it with you:
The basic idea is that our unnamed heroes (call them "H" and "P" if you need to give them names) are like one of those cardboard cutouts that you can stand behind and get your picture taken.
In the animation, a series of different faces would appear, making it seem as though they're standing behind the cutout.
Like I said, I'm really pleased with how this image turned out.
Do you think maybe this would work as a logo? I think it definitely gets the idea across.
I don't have the animation ready yet, but I do have the primary element of it, and I'm fairly proud of how it turned out, so I thought I would jump the gun and share it with you:
The basic idea is that our unnamed heroes (call them "H" and "P" if you need to give them names) are like one of those cardboard cutouts that you can stand behind and get your picture taken.
In the animation, a series of different faces would appear, making it seem as though they're standing behind the cutout.
Like I said, I'm really pleased with how this image turned out.
Do you think maybe this would work as a logo? I think it definitely gets the idea across.
As You May Have Noticed
Once again Bloglet is having trouble communicating with Blogger (and has been for a couple of days), so those of you who are subscribed to Threshold haven't been getting updates.
Sorry.
Unfortunately, all I can do is wait for it to start working again on its own.
Sorry.
Unfortunately, all I can do is wait for it to start working again on its own.
It Could Be That Inspiration Has Struck...
...or it could be that it's 2:30 in the morning and I'm too tired to tell the difference between good and bad, but I kind of like this logo:
Thoughts?
Thoughts?
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
A Niche Cereal
It was 1996 when I signed up with an ISP and began using the Web on a regular basis rather than just using it when I visited my friend Joel.
At that time, I remember going to Yahoo! and seeing how no matter what the category you were looking in there was always a section for “Gay and Lesbian.”
Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but I just thought it was kind of strange and I didn’t see that it always served any real purpose. I mean, if you’re looking to find, say, public libraries, do you really need to set aside a special listing of libraries for gays and lesbians? Are there such things as libraries that cater specifically to gays and lesbians? If so, why? If not, why have a separate category?
Anyway, when I went grocery shopping today I saw this cereal that was just so odd and which made me immediately think that the makers are trying to appeal to a specialized group:
I mean, what are they getting at with a name like “Good Friends” and featuring a picture of two women on the box?
What immediately sprang to my mind was two women about whom rumors have been circulating and who demur by saying, “What? No, we’re not together. We’re just good friends.”
So it struck me as specializing even further than the Yahoo! thing and targeting closeted lesbians who happen to be interested in adding more fiber to their diets.
I know, I’m weird, but so is that cereal, no matter how you look at it.
On a totally unrelated note, I did a little bit of work on heroicportraits.com today.
I wrote up the bulk of the copy for it and posted a “Coming Soon” page that features the logo over at the site.
I still have to come up with a design for the actual site.
The layout is going to be pretty straightforward: a main page introducing the site, an FAQ page, a gallery, a price list, and an order form.
I figure I’ll set up a form that lets people choose what kind of portrait they want (just a low-res digital only image or a poster print) and some fields with basic information about what they’re looking for. I figure most of the requested portraits are likely to fall into some standard categories (though there will be an “other” option), and it will help them (and me) to be able to have some of what they want spelled out for them, allowing them to just add whatever other information they need.
Beyond all that, though, I need to figure out how I want it to look and what the navigation will be like.
In the meantime, though, I suppose I could just put up a basic site with a few sample pictures, a list of prices, and my heroicportraits.com e-mail address.
We’ll see, I guess.
At that time, I remember going to Yahoo! and seeing how no matter what the category you were looking in there was always a section for “Gay and Lesbian.”
Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but I just thought it was kind of strange and I didn’t see that it always served any real purpose. I mean, if you’re looking to find, say, public libraries, do you really need to set aside a special listing of libraries for gays and lesbians? Are there such things as libraries that cater specifically to gays and lesbians? If so, why? If not, why have a separate category?
Anyway, when I went grocery shopping today I saw this cereal that was just so odd and which made me immediately think that the makers are trying to appeal to a specialized group:
I mean, what are they getting at with a name like “Good Friends” and featuring a picture of two women on the box?
What immediately sprang to my mind was two women about whom rumors have been circulating and who demur by saying, “What? No, we’re not together. We’re just good friends.”
So it struck me as specializing even further than the Yahoo! thing and targeting closeted lesbians who happen to be interested in adding more fiber to their diets.
I know, I’m weird, but so is that cereal, no matter how you look at it.
On a totally unrelated note, I did a little bit of work on heroicportraits.com today.
I wrote up the bulk of the copy for it and posted a “Coming Soon” page that features the logo over at the site.
I still have to come up with a design for the actual site.
The layout is going to be pretty straightforward: a main page introducing the site, an FAQ page, a gallery, a price list, and an order form.
I figure I’ll set up a form that lets people choose what kind of portrait they want (just a low-res digital only image or a poster print) and some fields with basic information about what they’re looking for. I figure most of the requested portraits are likely to fall into some standard categories (though there will be an “other” option), and it will help them (and me) to be able to have some of what they want spelled out for them, allowing them to just add whatever other information they need.
Beyond all that, though, I need to figure out how I want it to look and what the navigation will be like.
In the meantime, though, I suppose I could just put up a basic site with a few sample pictures, a list of prices, and my heroicportraits.com e-mail address.
We’ll see, I guess.
Working Hard To Relax
For reasons that are beyond me, the totally made up nonsense word “chillax,” and all its variations, has become my favorite word of late.
For example I am (attempting) to write this while chillaxing in the hammock.
(I say “attempting,” as this is a really awkward position to type in.)
It is, after all, a perfectly lovely day, ideal for just hanging out and chillaxing.
Of course, I probably should be working on polishing off the HTML and CSS skills I picked up last year and get to work on designing a Web site for heroicportraits.com, but as I said, it’s a perfect day for chillaxing.
One problem that presents itself, though, is that it’s really awkward to drink from the ginormous (another good made up word) Star Wars collectible cup I got when I went to see Revenge of the Sith last year, and which I usually keep filled with water.
Also, my Nano’s earbud headphones are hurting my ears.
And bees keep buzzing around.
Hmm…you know, chillaxing is hard work.
For example I am (attempting) to write this while chillaxing in the hammock.
(I say “attempting,” as this is a really awkward position to type in.)
It is, after all, a perfectly lovely day, ideal for just hanging out and chillaxing.
Of course, I probably should be working on polishing off the HTML and CSS skills I picked up last year and get to work on designing a Web site for heroicportraits.com, but as I said, it’s a perfect day for chillaxing.
One problem that presents itself, though, is that it’s really awkward to drink from the ginormous (another good made up word) Star Wars collectible cup I got when I went to see Revenge of the Sith last year, and which I usually keep filled with water.
Also, my Nano’s earbud headphones are hurting my ears.
And bees keep buzzing around.
Hmm…you know, chillaxing is hard work.
Since It Met With Her Approval...
...here is my latest Heroic Portrait.
As I said, Stacy's instructions were a bit vague. She requested a "combo of Power Girl and a pirate lady."
For those who don't know comic books, Power Girl is sort of an alternate version of Supergirl, though she is different from Supergirl in two major ways: her boobs.
Originally conceived to be voluptuous, it's been said that artist Wally Wood had intended to make her breasts larger with each issue until the editors finally noticed.
That's a trend that seems to be continuing almost 30 years later (do a Google Image Search for "Power Girl" and you'll see what I mean).
In any case, since I didn't see any kind of direct connection between Power Girl and pirates, I took this to mean "a pirate lady with big boobs."
And there you have them...err, I mean, it.
As I pointed out to Stacy, it seems as though a little bit of St. Pauli Girl found its way into the picture as well, but I think it's all for the good.
I have to say that I like this one a lot (and not just because of the big boobs), and am very pleased with how it turned out, especially considering that I cranked it out relatively quickly.
As I said, Stacy's instructions were a bit vague. She requested a "combo of Power Girl and a pirate lady."
For those who don't know comic books, Power Girl is sort of an alternate version of Supergirl, though she is different from Supergirl in two major ways: her boobs.
Originally conceived to be voluptuous, it's been said that artist Wally Wood had intended to make her breasts larger with each issue until the editors finally noticed.
That's a trend that seems to be continuing almost 30 years later (do a Google Image Search for "Power Girl" and you'll see what I mean).
In any case, since I didn't see any kind of direct connection between Power Girl and pirates, I took this to mean "a pirate lady with big boobs."
And there you have them...err, I mean, it.
As I pointed out to Stacy, it seems as though a little bit of St. Pauli Girl found its way into the picture as well, but I think it's all for the good.
I have to say that I like this one a lot (and not just because of the big boobs), and am very pleased with how it turned out, especially considering that I cranked it out relatively quickly.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Logo
So here's my current logo idea. Thoughts?
Too simple? Not simple enough? Too super-heroey?
I was thinking of having a tagline that goes something like, "Put on your mask. Be yourself."
From Wallflower Back To Hermit
So on Friday my boss, or rather, my boss’s boss, came in to visit for a bit. It was just Scott and I that day, as Brian was off at another desk for some cross-training. Scott had gone to lunch, so it was just me manning the desk.
As it usually does when he comes in to visit, the big boss launched into a rather depressing discussion about how our company is circling the drain.
I made a comment along the lines of, “Sure, it has to happen now after I bought a condo.”
He backpedaled a little and said that he didn’t foresee us going out of business any time real soon, and added that with all of the other companies in the area a “guy like me” would have no trouble finding another job.
As an afterthought he added, “I mean, at least you have a clue.”
I’m not entirely sure what to make of that or what he meant by it, but I’m assuming it was complimentary.
I think it made Brian a little nervous when I told him about this, as he has since started taking an interest in getting in some free training while he can, so he signed up to take the Red Hat training that I’m taking in a couple of weeks.
Speaking of Brian, on Sunday he and Kathleen had a barbecue as a sort of belated birthday party for Kathleen, so I stopped by after work.
When I got to what I thought was their house I was a bit hesitant, as the address didn’t look right. At least, it wasn’t the address I had written down for them in my PDA. After double-checking that the Explorer parked in front of the garage was Brian’s, though, I came to realize that I had the wrong house number written down.
Which meant that the birthday present I ordered for Kathleen last week (the DVD and soundtrack combo of Walk the Line) was shipped to the wrong address. Whoops.
Hopefully their neighbors will be honest and will part with it.
It was the first time I’d talked to Kathleen since my birthday, and the main thing on my mind was what did she think of DuddyKat?
She looked uncomfortable and admitted that she’s been avoiding telling me that she didn’t like it.
Turns out that she actually was hoping for something more along the lines of what I’d originally started on, though she had realized that I might be a little creeped out by it.
So there’s another object lesson with Heroic Portraits: just as adding the greenish cast to the Zalfiro picture demonstrated that the pictures can be adjusted upon request, DuddyKat showed that people aren’t always going to like the finished product.
Oh well. The one consolation is that, thanks to the text of the entry accompanying the picture, three people doing a search on latex cat-suit were likely even more disappointed to see a cartoon cat than Kathleen was.
Anyway, it’s not a total kat-astrophe, as I did nearly finish the picture I originally had in mind, as I’d done things sort of separately, so drawing the body wasn’t creepy, and drawing Kathleen’s face wasn’t creepy, but when I started to put the two together, that’s when the creepiness crawled up my spine.
I guess I’ll just have to get over it and finish it so that I can have another satisfied…well, not customer, but I suppose that “guinea pig” isn’t exactly the most flattering term.
As for the barbecue itself, I’ll admit that, not surprisingly, I felt out of place, surrounded by people whom I’ve heard of but for the most part haven’t met.
And of course I would feel like an outsider anyway, but in this case I most decidedly was one. Not that they were doing anything to be deliberately exclusionary, but most of the people there were from the fire company, and as such were part of a group that I’m not part of.
Even if I weren’t socially awkward it would be difficult for me to participate in conversations that would be filled with in-jokes and banter and references to people and things that are almost totally alien to me.
I think the overall effect is rather a lot like what you would get if you were to dump Brian in the middle of a comic book convention (though honestly, even I would probably feel uncomfortable at a comic book convention).
Add in the fact that being around people who are drinking isn’t at the top of my list of things I like to do, for various and mostly obvious reasons, and the end result is a Jon standing off in a corner by himself.
And no, I am definitely not asking anyone to feel bad for me this time around, I’m just telling you how it was.
I also don’t want to seem ungrateful for being invited.
After all, to his credit, Brian did try to bring me into the mix by pointing out that I was the one who did the “Fireman” picture of him. That worked for about ten seconds and then they went back to what they’d been talking about.
Thanks for trying, though.
At one point Kathleen came over and said, “Smile. Move around. Mingle.”
I looked at her, laughed, and said, “Who the hell do you think you’re talking to?”
She asked, “Is that why you came here? To just stand in a corner by yourself?”
I responded, “No, I came here to be polite and to have something to eat.”“Did you eat?”
“Yes, and now I’m going to leave because my contacts are bugging me (I’d had them in since 5 am) and it’s almost time for The Simpsons.”
I’m sure they’re all very nice people, but on my best day I’m not in much of a party mood, and the end of a long three days at work is decidedly not my best day, and so after about 40 minutes I headed home.
I would say that I didn’t do much today, except that I kind of did.
Granted, I only set foot outside my door to get the mail (and that was a waste of time; all I had was a flyer and one of those “missing” things), but while inside I paid a bunch of bills, registered a domain, and completed a new Heroic Portrait, this time for Scott’s wife, Stacy.
I’m waiting on her reaction before posting it here. I’m hoping she’ll like it. After all, this is my first “request.” All the others I’ve done have just been what I thought I should do. This one is what Stacy wanted done.
It was an especially good test for me, as her request was sort of ambiguous at best, so I guess we’ll see how I do when I don’t have detailed instructions.
As it usually does when he comes in to visit, the big boss launched into a rather depressing discussion about how our company is circling the drain.
I made a comment along the lines of, “Sure, it has to happen now after I bought a condo.”
He backpedaled a little and said that he didn’t foresee us going out of business any time real soon, and added that with all of the other companies in the area a “guy like me” would have no trouble finding another job.
As an afterthought he added, “I mean, at least you have a clue.”
I’m not entirely sure what to make of that or what he meant by it, but I’m assuming it was complimentary.
I think it made Brian a little nervous when I told him about this, as he has since started taking an interest in getting in some free training while he can, so he signed up to take the Red Hat training that I’m taking in a couple of weeks.
Speaking of Brian, on Sunday he and Kathleen had a barbecue as a sort of belated birthday party for Kathleen, so I stopped by after work.
When I got to what I thought was their house I was a bit hesitant, as the address didn’t look right. At least, it wasn’t the address I had written down for them in my PDA. After double-checking that the Explorer parked in front of the garage was Brian’s, though, I came to realize that I had the wrong house number written down.
Which meant that the birthday present I ordered for Kathleen last week (the DVD and soundtrack combo of Walk the Line) was shipped to the wrong address. Whoops.
Hopefully their neighbors will be honest and will part with it.
It was the first time I’d talked to Kathleen since my birthday, and the main thing on my mind was what did she think of DuddyKat?
She looked uncomfortable and admitted that she’s been avoiding telling me that she didn’t like it.
Turns out that she actually was hoping for something more along the lines of what I’d originally started on, though she had realized that I might be a little creeped out by it.
So there’s another object lesson with Heroic Portraits: just as adding the greenish cast to the Zalfiro picture demonstrated that the pictures can be adjusted upon request, DuddyKat showed that people aren’t always going to like the finished product.
Oh well. The one consolation is that, thanks to the text of the entry accompanying the picture, three people doing a search on latex cat-suit were likely even more disappointed to see a cartoon cat than Kathleen was.
Anyway, it’s not a total kat-astrophe, as I did nearly finish the picture I originally had in mind, as I’d done things sort of separately, so drawing the body wasn’t creepy, and drawing Kathleen’s face wasn’t creepy, but when I started to put the two together, that’s when the creepiness crawled up my spine.
I guess I’ll just have to get over it and finish it so that I can have another satisfied…well, not customer, but I suppose that “guinea pig” isn’t exactly the most flattering term.
As for the barbecue itself, I’ll admit that, not surprisingly, I felt out of place, surrounded by people whom I’ve heard of but for the most part haven’t met.
And of course I would feel like an outsider anyway, but in this case I most decidedly was one. Not that they were doing anything to be deliberately exclusionary, but most of the people there were from the fire company, and as such were part of a group that I’m not part of.
Even if I weren’t socially awkward it would be difficult for me to participate in conversations that would be filled with in-jokes and banter and references to people and things that are almost totally alien to me.
I think the overall effect is rather a lot like what you would get if you were to dump Brian in the middle of a comic book convention (though honestly, even I would probably feel uncomfortable at a comic book convention).
Add in the fact that being around people who are drinking isn’t at the top of my list of things I like to do, for various and mostly obvious reasons, and the end result is a Jon standing off in a corner by himself.
And no, I am definitely not asking anyone to feel bad for me this time around, I’m just telling you how it was.
I also don’t want to seem ungrateful for being invited.
After all, to his credit, Brian did try to bring me into the mix by pointing out that I was the one who did the “Fireman” picture of him. That worked for about ten seconds and then they went back to what they’d been talking about.
Thanks for trying, though.
At one point Kathleen came over and said, “Smile. Move around. Mingle.”
I looked at her, laughed, and said, “Who the hell do you think you’re talking to?”
She asked, “Is that why you came here? To just stand in a corner by yourself?”
I responded, “No, I came here to be polite and to have something to eat.”“Did you eat?”
“Yes, and now I’m going to leave because my contacts are bugging me (I’d had them in since 5 am) and it’s almost time for The Simpsons.”
I’m sure they’re all very nice people, but on my best day I’m not in much of a party mood, and the end of a long three days at work is decidedly not my best day, and so after about 40 minutes I headed home.
I would say that I didn’t do much today, except that I kind of did.
Granted, I only set foot outside my door to get the mail (and that was a waste of time; all I had was a flyer and one of those “missing” things), but while inside I paid a bunch of bills, registered a domain, and completed a new Heroic Portrait, this time for Scott’s wife, Stacy.
I’m waiting on her reaction before posting it here. I’m hoping she’ll like it. After all, this is my first “request.” All the others I’ve done have just been what I thought I should do. This one is what Stacy wanted done.
It was an especially good test for me, as her request was sort of ambiguous at best, so I guess we’ll see how I do when I don’t have detailed instructions.
Move Along, Nothing To See Here...Yet
Just as an FYI, I have registered the domain www.heroicportraits.com.
There's no site up yet (I still have to create a logo and make some actual pages for it), but at least it's out there now, which brings me one step closer to actually doing this thing.
There's no site up yet (I still have to create a logo and make some actual pages for it), but at least it's out there now, which brings me one step closer to actually doing this thing.
Sunday, April 30, 2006
Mustn't...Have...Comedian...Killed
President Bush (Left) tries to be a good sport, but secretly fantasizes about having the Secret Service pound the crap out of impersonator Steve Bridges at the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner on Saturday night.
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