I once saw a movie (or TV show; I can’t remember which) in which someone said something really clever about something or other.
Yes; my memory of it is exactly that clear.
In any case, the “something” that was said was a play on words using the old expression that starts off “the best laid plans…” that ended with a really clever twist about how you can’t always plan to get laid.
It was funny at the time, though apparently not quite memorable enough to fully imprint itself in my mind.
My own failure to properly recall how it was worded reminds me of that footage of Dubya trying to say “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me,” but instead saying, “Fool me once, shame on you,” pausing, trying to remember how the rest of it goes, and finally summing it up with, “We can’t get fooled again.”
Personally, I think that’s an ironic sentiment coming from a man who fooled us twice (in 2000 and 2004), but all of that’s irrelevant in terms of this entry, which is actually about plans, and specifically how they can go astray (much like this entry started to).
So. The plan.
The plan was for Brian to pick me up and bring me with him to the airport, at which point he would catch his flight and go off in search of fun and jet-skiing in New Hampshire, and I would drive his truck home.
Mission accomplished.
Later, Kathleen would swing by on her way to work and we would swap vehicles.
Another item successfully checked off.
The next step in the plan involved me driving directly to Brian and Kathleen’s house after work on Friday, at which point Kathleen would drive me over to the dealership and I would pick up my car.
That’s where the plan began the whole “astray” thing.
On Friday afternoon I called the dealership to confirm that my car would be ready, and to find out how much it was going to cost me.
I hadn’t gotten a call back on Thursday, which I had assumed was a good sign. After all, he had given me the costs of the tires ($55 a piece), and had mentioned that he was hoping to get my rim for free under my warranty. So operating on the “no news is good news” theory, I assumed that he didn’t call to tell me how much the rim would cost because it would be covered and he therefore didn't need to call me and tell me.
Turns out I was right; there is actually a recall on my rims (which is no doubt related to the fact that one of my rims got bent in the first place), and so I’m getting four new rims (rather than just one) at no cost to me.
That was the good news.
The bad news was that the dealership was restricted to replacing the rims with a specific kind…which won’t arrive until Tuesday.
Fortunately Kathleen has been gracious enough to let me continue using her vehicle in the interim.
While I hate to look a gift horse in the mouth, driving her Sportage around hasn’t exactly been the sort of thrill-ride the parking garage guys in “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” enjoyed.
For one thing, I just don’t feel comfortable driving someone else’s vehicle. Nothing is where you expect it to be, and you don’t feel right about changing any sort of settings. After all, I don’t like it when people mess with the way I have my vehicle set up, so, in observance of Kant’s Categorical Imperative (look it up), I am reluctant to mess with the way Kathleen has hers set up.
Which leads us to the presets.
By “presets” I am referring to the preset stations on her in-dash XM Satellite radio.
To put it bluntly, they suck, and each one is shittier than the last. To make matters worse, there is no clearly marked “power” button, so it’s not easily possible to turn the thing off without taking time to familiarize myself with all of the controls, which, in the morning on my way to work, or in the evening when I get home and want nothing more than to just go to bed, isn’t an option.
Additional familiarization would be required to learn how to tune in something other than the presets.
So all I can do is turn the volume down and occasionally look in horror at the nightmarish litany of pop performers’ names as they scroll across the display. Names like “Alicia Keys,” “Usher,” and, (shudder) “Backstreet Boys.”
These performers, I think, will provide the soundtrack to my personal hell (the overcrowded one with all of the snakes).
Still, like I said, I really am grateful for the use of Kathleen’s vehicle to get me through the weekend, but I just wouldn’t be me if I didn’t throw out some semi-comic complaints about the whole thing...
As is probably apparent from the fact that I’m posting an entry on a Saturday, today is a rather slow day at work
Still, I suppose that I should do something.
Saturday, July 30, 2005
Thursday, July 28, 2005
...And When You Think Sylvia Plath You Don't Think Vivacious (Assuming You Know Who Sylvia Plath Is)
So here's a new picture I did of Jessica Simpson:
She doesn't necessarily look her best in this picture, but I found the image kind of intriguing (and reminiscent of another picture I did of her that I'm particularly fond of), and it's sort of thematically linked to the other picture I did this week, what with all of the shadows.
The darkness sort of suits her in a way that you wouldn't really expect for someone so bubbly and vivacious (I couldn't bring myself to say "bright"). I mean, when you think Jessica Simpson you don't normally think "darkness."
(For propriety's sake I won't mention what I think when I think Jessica Simpson)
As a somewhat related aside, does anyone else find it sort of sad that in the ads for "Dukes of Hazzard" her southern accent sounds totally bogus? I mean, bad acting is one thing, but she's actually from the south.
But whatever; she still looks inhumanly good in that bikini and (insert lewd comment about "bouncing something into her undercarriage" here), and a poll showed that 76% of people feel that she's the sexier Daisy Duke...
Anyway, I was supposed to do some work on that D&D picture this week. Oops. Sorry...
She doesn't necessarily look her best in this picture, but I found the image kind of intriguing (and reminiscent of another picture I did of her that I'm particularly fond of), and it's sort of thematically linked to the other picture I did this week, what with all of the shadows.
The darkness sort of suits her in a way that you wouldn't really expect for someone so bubbly and vivacious (I couldn't bring myself to say "bright"). I mean, when you think Jessica Simpson you don't normally think "darkness."
(For propriety's sake I won't mention what I think when I think Jessica Simpson)
As a somewhat related aside, does anyone else find it sort of sad that in the ads for "Dukes of Hazzard" her southern accent sounds totally bogus? I mean, bad acting is one thing, but she's actually from the south.
But whatever; she still looks inhumanly good in that bikini and (insert lewd comment about "bouncing something into her undercarriage" here), and a poll showed that 76% of people feel that she's the sexier Daisy Duke...
Anyway, I was supposed to do some work on that D&D picture this week. Oops. Sorry...
Taking A Vacation Without Leaving The Building
Yesterday morning when I was at the dealership dropping my car off I heard several people asking about someone named “Mickey.”
Specifically, they were asking things like, “Where is Mickey?” “Is Mickey out again?” and “Is Mickey coming in today?”
So this morning when I called in to say that no one had called me back yesterday to tell me how much this was going to cost, the guy I talked to said, “You mean Mickey didn’t call you?”
Apparently Mickey isn’t the most reliable employee they have…
As for the cost, I’m still not sure on that, as they’re waiting for a representative from Kia to stop by so they can try to talk him into having most of the work and parts covered by my warranty, which obviously would be cool.
Still, the costs that definitely aren’t covered are likely to take a decent chunk out of my discretionary income.
Even so, there is (or at least will be) more where that came from, so somewhere along the line I’ll probably splurge and buy something, thereby preventing myself from running into a “more money than I know what to do with” situation.
Of course, I do still have a problem of “more time off than I know what to do with,” as my vacation balance is continuing to accrue with no plans for getting away on the immediate horizon.
My next trip probably won’t be until January or so, at which point I’ll most likely head to Tucson for a little while.
But that’s not until next year, and I can only carry over 40 hours of vacation time, so somewhere along the line within the next few months I need to think of something to do.
Sure, I could just take the time off and hang out at home doing even more nothing than usual (which is what I’ve done in the past and will probably do again), but it occurred to me that maybe for once in my life I should actually do something and take a real vacation, not merely travel to someplace familiar to spend time with family and friends.
But where would I go?
Oh sure, there are lots of places in the world that people can travel to on vacation, but let me reiterate my question: where would I go?
Even for someone as...hmm, I’m at a loss for words here? Curmudgeonly? Apathetic? Ambivalent?
Anyway, even for someone as whatever-word-best-describes-my-reluctance-to-go-out-into-the-world-and-do-things as I am, there are places that I’d be willing to go (if not necessarily want to go), but most of them fall into one of two categories: Romantic/Family Getaways or Drunken Bacchanalias.
Obviously destinations designed for couples and families are less than ideal for me (though yeah, if I had someone to take with me I’d be perfectly willing to hit some romantic getaway), and my days of debauchery (sadly free of most forms of debauchery as they were) are pretty well behind me, so what travel options are available to a sober, single guy?
Of course, there is the obvious: singles cruises.
To be honest, I did actually find myself looking into that possibility the other day, though I imagine that the booze flows pretty freely on most of them, which could be a problem, to say nothing of the sheer mortifying humiliation I would feel if I actually paid money to go on one.
As desperate as I may be for “company,” I can’t really imagine myself going to such lengths (or expenses) to feed my desperation.
Hell, I can’t even bring myself to part with $25 a month to make use of any of the online personals (you can create a profile for free and perform searches, but actually contacting anyone costs money).
Besides, when I lived in Minnesota there was a girl where I worked who, so my boss informed me (when suggesting that I might look into doing the same), frequently went out on singles cruises.
To avoid getting into a lengthy description of this person that would only serve to offend people and make me look like a shallow jerk who puts too much stock in appearances, I’ll simply say that she had a great personality and leave it at that.
(My boss, on the other hand, was actually pretty hot. In fact, the oft-mentioned “Stone Face” looked rather a lot like a slightly younger and more voluptuous version of her, and, in fact sounded exactly like her.)
And while one person may not be a statistically valid cross-sample for a specific demographic, I suspect that the majority of women who go on those cruises have similarly great personalities.
(To be honest, she really didn’t have that great a personality; I was just trying to find a more polite way of saying that she was fat. She was sort of nice, but not really that dynamic a person. The splotchily-freckled receptionist working there, whom I got drunk and made out with one night, had a much more engaging personality.)
In any case, it seems that there really aren’t a lot of options available for me as far as going on a solo vacation.
I suppose that there are, as I so often hear about other activities, people who go off on vacations alone “all the time,” but the thing to remember is that we aren’t talking about “people,” we’re talking about me.
So yeah, looks like fifty extra hours of sitting at home doing nothing it is…
Specifically, they were asking things like, “Where is Mickey?” “Is Mickey out again?” and “Is Mickey coming in today?”
So this morning when I called in to say that no one had called me back yesterday to tell me how much this was going to cost, the guy I talked to said, “You mean Mickey didn’t call you?”
Apparently Mickey isn’t the most reliable employee they have…
As for the cost, I’m still not sure on that, as they’re waiting for a representative from Kia to stop by so they can try to talk him into having most of the work and parts covered by my warranty, which obviously would be cool.
Still, the costs that definitely aren’t covered are likely to take a decent chunk out of my discretionary income.
Even so, there is (or at least will be) more where that came from, so somewhere along the line I’ll probably splurge and buy something, thereby preventing myself from running into a “more money than I know what to do with” situation.
Of course, I do still have a problem of “more time off than I know what to do with,” as my vacation balance is continuing to accrue with no plans for getting away on the immediate horizon.
My next trip probably won’t be until January or so, at which point I’ll most likely head to Tucson for a little while.
But that’s not until next year, and I can only carry over 40 hours of vacation time, so somewhere along the line within the next few months I need to think of something to do.
Sure, I could just take the time off and hang out at home doing even more nothing than usual (which is what I’ve done in the past and will probably do again), but it occurred to me that maybe for once in my life I should actually do something and take a real vacation, not merely travel to someplace familiar to spend time with family and friends.
But where would I go?
Oh sure, there are lots of places in the world that people can travel to on vacation, but let me reiterate my question: where would I go?
Even for someone as...hmm, I’m at a loss for words here? Curmudgeonly? Apathetic? Ambivalent?
Anyway, even for someone as whatever-word-best-describes-my-reluctance-to-go-out-into-the-world-and-do-things as I am, there are places that I’d be willing to go (if not necessarily want to go), but most of them fall into one of two categories: Romantic/Family Getaways or Drunken Bacchanalias.
Obviously destinations designed for couples and families are less than ideal for me (though yeah, if I had someone to take with me I’d be perfectly willing to hit some romantic getaway), and my days of debauchery (sadly free of most forms of debauchery as they were) are pretty well behind me, so what travel options are available to a sober, single guy?
Of course, there is the obvious: singles cruises.
To be honest, I did actually find myself looking into that possibility the other day, though I imagine that the booze flows pretty freely on most of them, which could be a problem, to say nothing of the sheer mortifying humiliation I would feel if I actually paid money to go on one.
As desperate as I may be for “company,” I can’t really imagine myself going to such lengths (or expenses) to feed my desperation.
Hell, I can’t even bring myself to part with $25 a month to make use of any of the online personals (you can create a profile for free and perform searches, but actually contacting anyone costs money).
Besides, when I lived in Minnesota there was a girl where I worked who, so my boss informed me (when suggesting that I might look into doing the same), frequently went out on singles cruises.
To avoid getting into a lengthy description of this person that would only serve to offend people and make me look like a shallow jerk who puts too much stock in appearances, I’ll simply say that she had a great personality and leave it at that.
(My boss, on the other hand, was actually pretty hot. In fact, the oft-mentioned “Stone Face” looked rather a lot like a slightly younger and more voluptuous version of her, and, in fact sounded exactly like her.)
And while one person may not be a statistically valid cross-sample for a specific demographic, I suspect that the majority of women who go on those cruises have similarly great personalities.
(To be honest, she really didn’t have that great a personality; I was just trying to find a more polite way of saying that she was fat. She was sort of nice, but not really that dynamic a person. The splotchily-freckled receptionist working there, whom I got drunk and made out with one night, had a much more engaging personality.)
In any case, it seems that there really aren’t a lot of options available for me as far as going on a solo vacation.
I suppose that there are, as I so often hear about other activities, people who go off on vacations alone “all the time,” but the thing to remember is that we aren’t talking about “people,” we’re talking about me.
So yeah, looks like fifty extra hours of sitting at home doing nothing it is…
Summer Camp: Zany Romp Or Harrowing Dash For Your Life?
So the dealership didn’t call back to give me the estimate on the tires and wheel, but honestly, it’s not like I have any choice about whether or not to do it, as it needs to be done in order to pass the state inspection.
The one problem is that the additional work could mean that they’ll have my car until Friday.
Of course, that won’t actually leave me carless, as tomorrow I have to give Brian a ride to the airport.
Or rather, he’s giving me a ride and then I’m taking his car, which I will then, apparently, swap for Kathleen’s, as Brian’s has better A/C.
As long as the car is ready by Friday evening I’ll be able to rush over to Brian and Kathleen’s after work and have Kathleen bring me over to the dealership, at which point I will shell out a bunch of money, and then be back in my car, which, presumably, should ride more smoothly with the new (and unbent) tires, and which will also indicate how much fuel I have and have a working A/C system (Just in time for the cold front that’s moved in and cooled temperatures off from their blistering heights; as always, my timing is impeccable).
Beyond bringing my car in to the dealership this morning and catching a ride home with Kathleen on her way in to work, my day was pretty uneventful.
After I got home from the dealership I sat around for a while and eventually took a nap.
And that was pretty much it until the mechanic called to give me the bad news.
Later, the phone rang again, though this time it was Brian.
Even though it had been his intention that I would drop him off at the airport to catch his plane it hadn’t occurred to him until today to actually ask me if I’d do so.
Of course, he was unaware that Kathleen and I had already worked out the details without him.
He’s actually heading to New Hampshire to hang out at a summer camp that he used to work for (which had nearly become the infamous “Camp Crystal Lake”) and to hang out with is friends.
I never went to camp when I was a kid, and, quite honestly, I never understood the appeal.
I suppose it would be different for someone living in an urban area, as part of the appeal is, presumably, getting out into nature. Growing up where I did, all I needed to do was step outside and bam! Instant nature.
In that regard, most of my early life was spent living at camp.
As for the rest of it…well, I’m not a fan of structured activities, and can’t really recall a time that I was one.
Then if you factor in the anti-social nature of my personality you soon realize that you don’t have a happy camper in the making.
Of course, in later life I did sort of go away to a couple of camps, though technically they were known as jail and rehab.
Still, it was very much a camp-like experience in many respects: shared living space, group activities, care packages from home, the looming specter of situational homosexuality that results from confining a bunch of guys together with nary a woman in sight…
And honestly, most of my jail time was spent in a “Work Camp,” though there wasn’t much in the way of canoeing or telling of ghost stories or whatever the hell it is that people do at camp when they aren’t running for their lives from some machete-wielding maniac.
Still, I’m sure that Brian will have lots of fun and that upon his return he’ll regale us with his tales of wacky “Meatballs”-esque escapades.
Assuming he survives! Chh-chh-hah-hah-hah!
Seriously Brian; the best way to survive a Jason attack is to never be seen nude on camera or have sex.
(That last part pretty much applies regardless of Jason’s presence or absence, though, considering that your wife won’t be there with you…)
In any case, I think that will do it for this entry, and in the meantime I think I’ll go back into that dark cabin where I just narrowly escaped having a harpoon thrown through my eye in order to see whether or not the mask-wearing psychopath is still in there because that’s the thing to do when you’re running for your life…
The one problem is that the additional work could mean that they’ll have my car until Friday.
Of course, that won’t actually leave me carless, as tomorrow I have to give Brian a ride to the airport.
Or rather, he’s giving me a ride and then I’m taking his car, which I will then, apparently, swap for Kathleen’s, as Brian’s has better A/C.
As long as the car is ready by Friday evening I’ll be able to rush over to Brian and Kathleen’s after work and have Kathleen bring me over to the dealership, at which point I will shell out a bunch of money, and then be back in my car, which, presumably, should ride more smoothly with the new (and unbent) tires, and which will also indicate how much fuel I have and have a working A/C system (Just in time for the cold front that’s moved in and cooled temperatures off from their blistering heights; as always, my timing is impeccable).
Beyond bringing my car in to the dealership this morning and catching a ride home with Kathleen on her way in to work, my day was pretty uneventful.
After I got home from the dealership I sat around for a while and eventually took a nap.
And that was pretty much it until the mechanic called to give me the bad news.
Later, the phone rang again, though this time it was Brian.
Even though it had been his intention that I would drop him off at the airport to catch his plane it hadn’t occurred to him until today to actually ask me if I’d do so.
Of course, he was unaware that Kathleen and I had already worked out the details without him.
He’s actually heading to New Hampshire to hang out at a summer camp that he used to work for (which had nearly become the infamous “Camp Crystal Lake”) and to hang out with is friends.
I never went to camp when I was a kid, and, quite honestly, I never understood the appeal.
I suppose it would be different for someone living in an urban area, as part of the appeal is, presumably, getting out into nature. Growing up where I did, all I needed to do was step outside and bam! Instant nature.
In that regard, most of my early life was spent living at camp.
As for the rest of it…well, I’m not a fan of structured activities, and can’t really recall a time that I was one.
Then if you factor in the anti-social nature of my personality you soon realize that you don’t have a happy camper in the making.
Of course, in later life I did sort of go away to a couple of camps, though technically they were known as jail and rehab.
Still, it was very much a camp-like experience in many respects: shared living space, group activities, care packages from home, the looming specter of situational homosexuality that results from confining a bunch of guys together with nary a woman in sight…
And honestly, most of my jail time was spent in a “Work Camp,” though there wasn’t much in the way of canoeing or telling of ghost stories or whatever the hell it is that people do at camp when they aren’t running for their lives from some machete-wielding maniac.
Still, I’m sure that Brian will have lots of fun and that upon his return he’ll regale us with his tales of wacky “Meatballs”-esque escapades.
Assuming he survives! Chh-chh-hah-hah-hah!
Seriously Brian; the best way to survive a Jason attack is to never be seen nude on camera or have sex.
(That last part pretty much applies regardless of Jason’s presence or absence, though, considering that your wife won’t be there with you…)
In any case, I think that will do it for this entry, and in the meantime I think I’ll go back into that dark cabin where I just narrowly escaped having a harpoon thrown through my eye in order to see whether or not the mask-wearing psychopath is still in there because that’s the thing to do when you’re running for your life…
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
I Hate Being Right
Remember how I mentioned my belief that something would come up to eat away at my little nest egg of discretionary income?
I dropped my car off at the dealership for my inspection and service, and a bit ago they called to let me know that in order to pass the state inspection I will need two new tires. In fact, in one instance I need an entirely new wheel, as the current one is apparently bent (not sure how that happened).
I don't have the costs yet, but I'm sure it's not going to be cheap.
So either I had a premonition or I jinxed myself.
On a totally unrelated front, Wired has an interesting article about the Internet here.
It's kind of funny to look back on how wrong people were about how the Internet would evolve and what kind of role it would have in our daily lives.
In any case, I just thought I should mention that I'm really annoyed that I was right about the whole money thing. I'm sure I'll be back later with more.
I dropped my car off at the dealership for my inspection and service, and a bit ago they called to let me know that in order to pass the state inspection I will need two new tires. In fact, in one instance I need an entirely new wheel, as the current one is apparently bent (not sure how that happened).
I don't have the costs yet, but I'm sure it's not going to be cheap.
So either I had a premonition or I jinxed myself.
On a totally unrelated front, Wired has an interesting article about the Internet here.
It's kind of funny to look back on how wrong people were about how the Internet would evolve and what kind of role it would have in our daily lives.
In any case, I just thought I should mention that I'm really annoyed that I was right about the whole money thing. I'm sure I'll be back later with more.
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Fountain Of Youth
In Virginia your vehicle has to undergo a State Inspection every year, which requires buying a sticker which you must display in your window.
The costs of the inspection, the sticker, and any tickets resulting from not having a current sticker in your window, are just some of the many hidden taxes that can be found here, though exactly what the government services those taxes are paying for are often much harder to find than the taxes themselves.
In any case, along with the oil change and 15,000 mile "intermediate service," my car needs to have its annual inspection performed.
I usually just go to my dealership for all of this, and last week I'd tried to make use of the online scheduling to set up an appointment for this morning. I never got any sort of confirmation e-mail or call about the appointment, but I decided that it was irrelevant because even when you call to make an appointment you aren't really making an appointment, you're basically just letting them know that you'll be coming by, at which time you'll basically just be dealt with on a first come, first served basis.
They usually tell you to show up ridiculously early in the morning, too, at which time dozens of other people show up trying to get oil changes and whatnot before going to work.
Since just showing up seems to work exactly as well as calling ahead, I decided to just show up this morning. Further, I figured that if I went in a little later I could get in faster, having avoided the early morning rush.
I was wrong, and ended up having to make an "appointment" to show up really damned early tomorrow morning, at which point I'll have to contend with the dozens of other people who have just shown up...
I'll actually be leaving my car there all day, as I'll finally be getting the problem that keeps my gas gauge from working fixed.
After I got home this morning I hit Kathleen up with an IM to ask her if she wanted to go to lunch, as I know she doesn't have a standing conference call immediately after noon on Tuesdays and Thursdays, giving her some more leeway as far as her lunch hour goes, but she was leaving early for an appointment.
I ended up walking across the street to check out one of the places in the new plaza full of useless shops that was built not too long ago.
When it first started going up last year, it looked like it was going to be one big building, leading me to hope that they were going to build something useful, like a Wal-Mart, Target, or Best Buy to complement the already existing plaza full of useless shops and restaurants.
But alas, it was actually two separate strip malls being built.
They're actually doing some more construction in that lot, though this time I know better than to hope that it'll be anything worthwhile.
In any case, today I went over to check out the shop that sells "smoothies and healthy food."
I ordered a rather pricey fruit smoothie and an expensive sandwich.
As it turns out, the menu they have displayed on the wall isn't accurate, as they don't actually make every type of sandwich listed, and because that's just the way things work when you're Jon, I'd ordered one that they don't make, though the kid taking my order didn't realize that at the time, as the sandwiches are made ahead of time and kept in a cooler that I hadn't noticed, so he wasn't aware of what was or was not in stock.
After he and the other lady working there puzzled over the fact that I couldn't find the type of sandwich I'd ordered in the display, they realized that it was one that they don't make, and so asked me if I'd like to choose another, which I did.
Both the smoothie and the second-choice sandwich were very good, but hardly worth the cost.
Rather than carrying them home, I sat on a bench in front of the fountain in the little courtyard that was built so that the different restaurants could offer al fresco dining.
It's actually kind of nice, so I took a picture with my PDA:
Every other time I've walked by the fountain it's been overrun by teenagers just hanging out, which is why I call it the "Fountain of Youth," but today I had it to myself until I was almost done eating, at which point an attractive young housewife and her two kids came to sit down on one of the other benches.
As I was leaving I cocked my eyebrow a bit, as I thought I saw the woman holding some sort of tether that was attached to the younger of the two kids, but then I noticed that it was actually plastic tubing for attaching to an oxygen tank and that the other end of the tube was actually placed into the kid's nose.
He wasn't hooked up to a tank at the time, but obviously there was some problem that would necessitate being prepared to do so.
Poor kid.
From there I came home and started working on making a "Sin City" theme for my PDA.
This required scanning in some pictures from that issue of "Maxim" that did a "Sin City" special when the movie came out.
I scanned in this image from the Frank Miller cover as the background image:
For the image that would display in the background of the "Start" menu, I wanted to make use of the "centerfold" style image of Brittany Murphy used inside the magazine.
Because this is a very big image that would be rather unwieldy to scan, it was my hope that someone else had done the work for me, and that I'd just have to find a copy of it to download.
Unfortunately, in the decade or so in which I've been using the Internet to acquire pictures, the people I've come to rely on have gotten really lazy, and I was unable to find a complete copy of the image.
This meant that because I wanted it done right I had to do it myself, which was a pain. After all, the picture was spread across three full magazine pages. So I had to scan it a page at a time and try to piece it together seamlessly.
That didn't work. The required folding and holding in place caused all sorts of artifacts in the final scan.
Ultimately, I was able to take one of the incomplete scans someone else had posted, which, luckily, contained the piece I was having the most trouble with, and semi-seamlessly integrate it with the two pieces that I was able to get to scan reasonably well.
This is the end result:
The fact that it's so tiny helps to cover up the seams a little. I do have a much larger version of this composite which I will use as a reference for my own rendering of this image, so don't worry, you will get to see it somewhat more full-sized somewhere along the line.
In any case, I need to figure out what I'm going to do for dinner tonight so that I can decide what I need to defrost or what other ingredients I need to pick up. I will most likely return later tonight.
The costs of the inspection, the sticker, and any tickets resulting from not having a current sticker in your window, are just some of the many hidden taxes that can be found here, though exactly what the government services those taxes are paying for are often much harder to find than the taxes themselves.
In any case, along with the oil change and 15,000 mile "intermediate service," my car needs to have its annual inspection performed.
I usually just go to my dealership for all of this, and last week I'd tried to make use of the online scheduling to set up an appointment for this morning. I never got any sort of confirmation e-mail or call about the appointment, but I decided that it was irrelevant because even when you call to make an appointment you aren't really making an appointment, you're basically just letting them know that you'll be coming by, at which time you'll basically just be dealt with on a first come, first served basis.
They usually tell you to show up ridiculously early in the morning, too, at which time dozens of other people show up trying to get oil changes and whatnot before going to work.
Since just showing up seems to work exactly as well as calling ahead, I decided to just show up this morning. Further, I figured that if I went in a little later I could get in faster, having avoided the early morning rush.
I was wrong, and ended up having to make an "appointment" to show up really damned early tomorrow morning, at which point I'll have to contend with the dozens of other people who have just shown up...
I'll actually be leaving my car there all day, as I'll finally be getting the problem that keeps my gas gauge from working fixed.
After I got home this morning I hit Kathleen up with an IM to ask her if she wanted to go to lunch, as I know she doesn't have a standing conference call immediately after noon on Tuesdays and Thursdays, giving her some more leeway as far as her lunch hour goes, but she was leaving early for an appointment.
I ended up walking across the street to check out one of the places in the new plaza full of useless shops that was built not too long ago.
When it first started going up last year, it looked like it was going to be one big building, leading me to hope that they were going to build something useful, like a Wal-Mart, Target, or Best Buy to complement the already existing plaza full of useless shops and restaurants.
But alas, it was actually two separate strip malls being built.
They're actually doing some more construction in that lot, though this time I know better than to hope that it'll be anything worthwhile.
In any case, today I went over to check out the shop that sells "smoothies and healthy food."
I ordered a rather pricey fruit smoothie and an expensive sandwich.
As it turns out, the menu they have displayed on the wall isn't accurate, as they don't actually make every type of sandwich listed, and because that's just the way things work when you're Jon, I'd ordered one that they don't make, though the kid taking my order didn't realize that at the time, as the sandwiches are made ahead of time and kept in a cooler that I hadn't noticed, so he wasn't aware of what was or was not in stock.
After he and the other lady working there puzzled over the fact that I couldn't find the type of sandwich I'd ordered in the display, they realized that it was one that they don't make, and so asked me if I'd like to choose another, which I did.
Both the smoothie and the second-choice sandwich were very good, but hardly worth the cost.
Rather than carrying them home, I sat on a bench in front of the fountain in the little courtyard that was built so that the different restaurants could offer al fresco dining.
It's actually kind of nice, so I took a picture with my PDA:
Every other time I've walked by the fountain it's been overrun by teenagers just hanging out, which is why I call it the "Fountain of Youth," but today I had it to myself until I was almost done eating, at which point an attractive young housewife and her two kids came to sit down on one of the other benches.
As I was leaving I cocked my eyebrow a bit, as I thought I saw the woman holding some sort of tether that was attached to the younger of the two kids, but then I noticed that it was actually plastic tubing for attaching to an oxygen tank and that the other end of the tube was actually placed into the kid's nose.
He wasn't hooked up to a tank at the time, but obviously there was some problem that would necessitate being prepared to do so.
Poor kid.
From there I came home and started working on making a "Sin City" theme for my PDA.
This required scanning in some pictures from that issue of "Maxim" that did a "Sin City" special when the movie came out.
I scanned in this image from the Frank Miller cover as the background image:
For the image that would display in the background of the "Start" menu, I wanted to make use of the "centerfold" style image of Brittany Murphy used inside the magazine.
Because this is a very big image that would be rather unwieldy to scan, it was my hope that someone else had done the work for me, and that I'd just have to find a copy of it to download.
Unfortunately, in the decade or so in which I've been using the Internet to acquire pictures, the people I've come to rely on have gotten really lazy, and I was unable to find a complete copy of the image.
This meant that because I wanted it done right I had to do it myself, which was a pain. After all, the picture was spread across three full magazine pages. So I had to scan it a page at a time and try to piece it together seamlessly.
That didn't work. The required folding and holding in place caused all sorts of artifacts in the final scan.
Ultimately, I was able to take one of the incomplete scans someone else had posted, which, luckily, contained the piece I was having the most trouble with, and semi-seamlessly integrate it with the two pieces that I was able to get to scan reasonably well.
This is the end result:
The fact that it's so tiny helps to cover up the seams a little. I do have a much larger version of this composite which I will use as a reference for my own rendering of this image, so don't worry, you will get to see it somewhat more full-sized somewhere along the line.
In any case, I need to figure out what I'm going to do for dinner tonight so that I can decide what I need to defrost or what other ingredients I need to pick up. I will most likely return later tonight.
Deleted Scene
Last week I mentioned that I'd gotten back to work on the character portraits for Scott's D&D group and that I was uncertain as to the fate of two of the characters, as the people playing them have moved away.
Well, basically there's no longer a place for them in the group picture, so one of them, whom I'd started on last week, will remain incomplete. I got quite a bit done on his portrait, but there's enough left to do that it would be too much work to finish it.
The other one, though, is complete, and because I was pleased with how she turned out I feel that she should get a chance to be seen, even if not in her original context. Think of it kind of like a "deleted scene" on a DVD.
And so, here she is:
I was especially pleased by the way her swords turned out, particularly the "icy" one.
In any case, the exclusion of the two characters means that I only have one left to go, which I hope to finish this week, along with a background image for the group.
Anyway, it's late and I should probably crash, but I thought I would share this image with those of you who are interested in seeing this sort of thing, and to let the members of the D&D group know what might have been...
Well, basically there's no longer a place for them in the group picture, so one of them, whom I'd started on last week, will remain incomplete. I got quite a bit done on his portrait, but there's enough left to do that it would be too much work to finish it.
The other one, though, is complete, and because I was pleased with how she turned out I feel that she should get a chance to be seen, even if not in her original context. Think of it kind of like a "deleted scene" on a DVD.
And so, here she is:
I was especially pleased by the way her swords turned out, particularly the "icy" one.
In any case, the exclusion of the two characters means that I only have one left to go, which I hope to finish this week, along with a background image for the group.
Anyway, it's late and I should probably crash, but I thought I would share this image with those of you who are interested in seeing this sort of thing, and to let the members of the D&D group know what might have been...
Monday, July 25, 2005
That Doesn't Pass The Time
Saturday night when I went home I was in a bad mood, as it had been a long, long day. Because of my black mood and the fact that my shoulder had been hurting all day and seemed likely to continue hurting in the morning, I opted to “sleep in” until 5 on Sunday morning and skip my usual workout.
To add to the feeling of “being naughty” I decided not to pack a breakfast or lunch to bring with me.
In fact, I was correct in my belief that my shoulder would continue to hurt, so that mollified any guilt I might have felt about not working out, and the fact that on Friday my paycheck had included twelve and a half hours of holiday pay along with sixteen hours of overtime assuaged any guilt I felt about wasting money on buying my lunch.
On the topic of guilt, though, my mother called me shortly after I got home last night to let me know that she and my dad would be gone all day today, as today is their anniversary.
If you were to ask me, “When is your parents’ anniversary?” I would be able to tell you, without giving it any thought, “July 25th.” However, that knowledge and the knowledge of the fact that the 25th was rapidly approaching never managed to connect, and so the thought, “My parents’ anniversary is coming up” never occurred to me.
My mother advised me not to feel guilty, though, as she would prefer that we all (myself and my siblings) forget it and not bother giving them gifts.
For the record, it’s their 46th anniversary. Not bad for two people who met on a blind date.
As I mentioned earlier, I had a lot of extra money in my last paycheck. As it stands, I have enough to buy that Tablet PC I’ve been wanting without having to do any real damage to my savings (particularly since I’ll be racking up forty hours of overtime next month thanks to my JavaScript and CSS classes).
So basically there was nothing stopping me from going on line and buying the thing.
Yet I didn’t do it.
Further, I really didn’t even feel compelled to do so. Yeah, I want it, but evidently I’m not exactly chomping at the bit to buy it.
It occurred to me that if I waited a couple of months (in September I have three paydays), I could buy a more expensive, higher-quality, and full-featured Tablet PC.
That’s not the real reason I’m holding off, though.
Basically, I just have a feeling that as soon as I spend that money, something is going to come up and I’ll be hosed.
In fact, I have the feeling that something is going to come up anyway, and the money I have won’t be enough to cover it.
It’s not really a premonition or anything, just a general feeling of unease about having (to a very limited extent) more money than I know what to do with.
I guess I’m just too accustomed to living paycheck to paycheck.
Of course, there are more things out there that I want than I could afford to buy, so honestly, I do know what to do with the money; I probably just don’t know where to start.
But as much as I want those things, the urge to hold on to the money is pretty strong.
As it stands, I’m pretty sure that I will buy the Tablet PC at some point.
Just not yet.
This afternoon I had to go in to work for a training session. As I needed to go out in the world and do some things anyway I had headed out this morning with the intention of just idly killing time until the training session without having to return home.
So I left a bit before 11 and made my first stop of the day, which was to get the haircut that I’d put off getting on Wednesday.
That carried me until about 11:30, at which point I walked over to my optometrist’s office to pick up cleaning solution for my contacts.
Like it does every time I head to my optometrist’s, a small part of me was kind of hoping that this would be the time I would bump into “Stone Face.”
As per usual, though, she wasn’t there, as she has probably moved away (no, not to get away from me; it was something she was already talking about when I first met her).
The “Stone Face” thing refers to the woman in question’s overall lack of expressiveness, and is in now way intended to indicate that she was unattractive. Far from it; she was gorgeous. Given how attractive she was, the fact of her absence was exacerbated by just how unattractive, individually and collectively, the women actually working in the office were.
From there, despite having watched “Super Size Me” last week, I headed over to McDonald’s for lunch. I figured that I might as well, and I harbor no illusions about my lunch being “healthy” just because I got the grilled chicken.
After that I headed to Wal-Mart and picked up a few things.
I killed as much time there as I could, but it was still only a little after noon by the time I got out, and I didn’t need to be at the meeting until 2:30.
There were a couple of places I could have gone (the mall, Best Buy, etc.) to kill some more time, but I just didn’t feel up to it, so I just decided to do my grocery shopping, which I’d planned to do on the way back from the training session, and go home and wait until it was time to leave for the meeting.
So that’s what I did.
There’s an episode of “The Simpsons” in which Krusty, alone in his house, goes to the refrigerator and asks, “Champagne or Slim Fast?” He then grabs one of each, pours them together, takes a drink, and says, “Ahh…that passes the time.”
That’s what came to mind when it occurred to me how pathetic it is that I can’t find anything that I want to do out in the world to pass the time for three hours…
In any case, there are some shows on my DVR’s hard drive that I should watch. I’ll probably be back later with more.
To add to the feeling of “being naughty” I decided not to pack a breakfast or lunch to bring with me.
In fact, I was correct in my belief that my shoulder would continue to hurt, so that mollified any guilt I might have felt about not working out, and the fact that on Friday my paycheck had included twelve and a half hours of holiday pay along with sixteen hours of overtime assuaged any guilt I felt about wasting money on buying my lunch.
On the topic of guilt, though, my mother called me shortly after I got home last night to let me know that she and my dad would be gone all day today, as today is their anniversary.
If you were to ask me, “When is your parents’ anniversary?” I would be able to tell you, without giving it any thought, “July 25th.” However, that knowledge and the knowledge of the fact that the 25th was rapidly approaching never managed to connect, and so the thought, “My parents’ anniversary is coming up” never occurred to me.
My mother advised me not to feel guilty, though, as she would prefer that we all (myself and my siblings) forget it and not bother giving them gifts.
For the record, it’s their 46th anniversary. Not bad for two people who met on a blind date.
As I mentioned earlier, I had a lot of extra money in my last paycheck. As it stands, I have enough to buy that Tablet PC I’ve been wanting without having to do any real damage to my savings (particularly since I’ll be racking up forty hours of overtime next month thanks to my JavaScript and CSS classes).
So basically there was nothing stopping me from going on line and buying the thing.
Yet I didn’t do it.
Further, I really didn’t even feel compelled to do so. Yeah, I want it, but evidently I’m not exactly chomping at the bit to buy it.
It occurred to me that if I waited a couple of months (in September I have three paydays), I could buy a more expensive, higher-quality, and full-featured Tablet PC.
That’s not the real reason I’m holding off, though.
Basically, I just have a feeling that as soon as I spend that money, something is going to come up and I’ll be hosed.
In fact, I have the feeling that something is going to come up anyway, and the money I have won’t be enough to cover it.
It’s not really a premonition or anything, just a general feeling of unease about having (to a very limited extent) more money than I know what to do with.
I guess I’m just too accustomed to living paycheck to paycheck.
Of course, there are more things out there that I want than I could afford to buy, so honestly, I do know what to do with the money; I probably just don’t know where to start.
But as much as I want those things, the urge to hold on to the money is pretty strong.
As it stands, I’m pretty sure that I will buy the Tablet PC at some point.
Just not yet.
This afternoon I had to go in to work for a training session. As I needed to go out in the world and do some things anyway I had headed out this morning with the intention of just idly killing time until the training session without having to return home.
So I left a bit before 11 and made my first stop of the day, which was to get the haircut that I’d put off getting on Wednesday.
That carried me until about 11:30, at which point I walked over to my optometrist’s office to pick up cleaning solution for my contacts.
Like it does every time I head to my optometrist’s, a small part of me was kind of hoping that this would be the time I would bump into “Stone Face.”
As per usual, though, she wasn’t there, as she has probably moved away (no, not to get away from me; it was something she was already talking about when I first met her).
The “Stone Face” thing refers to the woman in question’s overall lack of expressiveness, and is in now way intended to indicate that she was unattractive. Far from it; she was gorgeous. Given how attractive she was, the fact of her absence was exacerbated by just how unattractive, individually and collectively, the women actually working in the office were.
From there, despite having watched “Super Size Me” last week, I headed over to McDonald’s for lunch. I figured that I might as well, and I harbor no illusions about my lunch being “healthy” just because I got the grilled chicken.
After that I headed to Wal-Mart and picked up a few things.
I killed as much time there as I could, but it was still only a little after noon by the time I got out, and I didn’t need to be at the meeting until 2:30.
There were a couple of places I could have gone (the mall, Best Buy, etc.) to kill some more time, but I just didn’t feel up to it, so I just decided to do my grocery shopping, which I’d planned to do on the way back from the training session, and go home and wait until it was time to leave for the meeting.
So that’s what I did.
There’s an episode of “The Simpsons” in which Krusty, alone in his house, goes to the refrigerator and asks, “Champagne or Slim Fast?” He then grabs one of each, pours them together, takes a drink, and says, “Ahh…that passes the time.”
That’s what came to mind when it occurred to me how pathetic it is that I can’t find anything that I want to do out in the world to pass the time for three hours…
In any case, there are some shows on my DVR’s hard drive that I should watch. I’ll probably be back later with more.
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